Desperate Measures

 I never thought I would have to beg for help!

I managed when Hisao died to keep us afloat, through cancer and getting the kids an education but this move has broken me!  I'm crying every single day because I don't see how to make the money we need.  The kids are helping as much as possible.  This month I'm short for the rent and that is with David buying food and cat food, Hannah paying for the vets and the other two buying things that we need, gas for the car, food sometimes and paying their own medical bills.

If I could get more students that would help but since the pandemic we haven't recovered.  

I know that moving will mean not paying rent, which is good, but having to take out a loan is the same thing.  I'm beyond angry at the state of the house, it's not liveable at all.  I've tried to be positive about it but I'm just stressed.  It's sad that the only place I like in the house is the outside bench, that's the only place I feel comfortable.  

So I've set up a crowdfunding campaign.  I don't know if this will work but I've got to try, I have no other ideas on how to make money.  That's not true I have plenty of ideas but no money to start them!!   

Here is the link to my campaign.  One Year Before We Have To Move | GoGetFunding

Hope that works!!!

Made A Start

 This past weekend I've managed to make a start of sorting things from this house.

It's sad that we are moving to a place half the size of where we live now and therefore have to downsize a lot.  Besides books, we don't really own a lot of stuff.  I've never collected nick-nacks or ornaments,  I don't have many soft furnishings, just a change of bedding and extra winter covers.   The kids have their things, again a lot of books, their own computers but not a load of stuff.  But even the bit that we have is too much!  

I was able to give a lot of children's books to one of my friends.  I was happy to do that as I know English children's books can be expensive.  I like to feel that I can pass on things that will be well-loved and used!

Sunday I spent the morning emptying the top cupboards in my kitchen.  These cupboards are too high to be useful, I need a step ladder to reach them, so things that I don't use get put up there.  I haven't looked in them for a few years.  Most of the things were trash, old plastic containers, a broken coffee maker and other bits and pieces.  I did find an old tin of beans and a cup soup.

Beans from 2012

 

cup soup from 2014

looks like it was nice!

I also made a chicken pie for lunch. I've been wanting to eat chicken pie for the past few weeks but it's been too hot to make it.  Sunday started off rather cool, warmed up by the afternoon but not a sticky heat.  It was nice to bake, one of the things I miss in the summer!!

Stress!!

 I'm completely, absolutely, and totally stressed by thinking about this move! I now have mouth ulcers which I only get when my stress is too high!!

We have until January 2025 here but I want to move in October 2024, just over a year away!!  But there is so much to be done and basically no time.  Everybody is working so trying to find time when two or three of us can go and work on the other house is hard.  Summer we didn't do anything, it was just too hot and getting heat stroke wouldn't have helped.  

Another problem is money.  Even just doing the very basic things to make the house liveable will cost over 500 man yen (about 3000 pounds).  I need to offer some money to the owners here because of the damage the cats have done, we have to put a new tank in for the toilet waste and get the bamboo in the neighbor's yard cut and uprooted!!  I have no idea where I can get this money from.  I don't want to go into debt, and my bank won't give me a loan, even the loan that was guaranteed by the government during the pandemic I couldn't get because I'm a foreigner.  I've looked at making money online but all seems rather confusing.  One thing I'm thinking about is setting up a crowdfunding page.  But that seems kind of cheeky, just asking for money without working for it!!  We will see.

I've been digging myself into a hole by living in my head, just thinking the same things over and over but not getting any answers, plus wanting to stuff myself with sweets which I know is bad for me. Then yesterday two of my good friends reached out to me.  One of my friends lives in Japan, she called and we sat and talked for over an hour.  That was so nice.  Then another one of my friends sent me a voicemail, really helping to see another perspective on this move.  She said I should find the adventure in this and be grateful for the house and having a place that we own.  This is true, I am grateful that we have this place as I know trying to rent another place would be impossible with the cats. 

Also for all the people who left comments on my blog, thank you!  I thought I had set this up so I would get alerts for the comments but the alerts went into my spam folder and I didn't see them.  I wasn't ignoring you!!

And of course a cat photo to finish!!

Sam and Frodo!

Sixty Two By Sixty Two

 I've been debating whether to post this or not, but I know if I don't I won't feel accountable!!

So I still need to lose a lot of weight.  At least 30 kilos (about 4 stones) to get to the right weight for my height according to BMI charts that I've looked at!

So I've decided to make a goal of getting to 62 kilos by the time I'm 62 next August!

That is going to be a lot of hard work!! I can't think of losing 30 kilos, it's too much and I feel overwhelmed by the idea!  So I'm going to break it down,  first goal is to get under 90kgs.  I'm now about 95kgs, so I hope in a few weeks I can do that!!!

I'm also going to find some exercise I can do.  Since having a herniated disc in my neck in February I've been suffering from pain in my neck and upper back.  So I want to find some simple stretches to help that area a bit.  Also, I have to be careful not to irritate my knee, it's not too painful at the moment but I don't want it to flair up.  One thing is that with the weather slowly cooling down, I can get more done here and at the other house which is all good exercise.  

Wish me luck!!

David!

David keeps taking my phone and taking silly selfies, so I told him that I was going to post them on here.  Don't think he'll stop but it's fun!!

Finally

 The weather is cooling down.  Days are still hot, low 30 degrees, better than nearly 40 degrees.  Evenings, nights and mornings are lovely.  Lower 20 degrees.  It's so nice not to have to use the air conditioner all night,  I usually put it on for about an hour on dry mode, it's still very humid, so that really helps.  

The other morning I decided that since it's rather cool I should tackle the garden.  The weeds are as tall as me in some places!  I was really determined to make a difference but after 15 minutes I couldn't do anymore, my back and legs were very painful.  I did a bit and I guess it's a start.  I've asked the kids to help on Sunday, I'm hoping that we can get a lot done if we all pitch in!

One thing that I've noticed as the weather cools down the cats have started to fight more. I think that when it's too hot the cats just don't have the energy to fight.  The past few nights Hannah and I have been racing up and down stairs to stop the cats fighting!!

Still warm enough to lie like this!!!

What A Night

 It all started with bugs on the window, stink bugs!!!  The nights are rather cool so I want to open the windows instead of using the air conditioning.  So I opened the window and kept the screen closed, I noticed two or three stink bugs.  Two or three I could deal with, as long as they stay away from the small holes and don't come inside.  I sat reading for a while, looked up and found the screen covered in these bugs.

That's only half of them!!

So I closed the window and put on the air conditioner!

Got into bed, just drifting off when one of the cats started to meow and scratch at my door.  Got out of bed to find Fred sitting there, he suffers from seperation anixety (yes it is a thing in cats!).  So I petted him and talked to him for a bit, he calmed down and I went back to bed for all of 30 minutes.  Fred again, really pitiful meowing.  Got up, again, went and sat in David's room for about half an hour, just playing with Fred, again he seemed settled, back to bed.  Again the cats started, this time Fred and Mama, it's now 3am and I've had about one hours sleep!  Hannah got up and fed them, good, maybe I can get some sleep.  But of course not, after they had eaten Fred and Alan got into a fight, gripping each others throats,  fur flying, cats flying around.  Hannah helped to seperate them, I got my feet scratched up.  We locked Fred downstairs in the living room and left Alan in the corridor.  It was now just after 4am, I finally got to sleep. Talk about a wild night!!  I thought that having 4 children I would be use to this but not really.  Today is very busy with teaching and I am so miserable!!  I hope tonight will be better!!!

Fred

David and Alan

Not Finished

 This morning I had tests done because of the cancer I had 5 years ago.  Mammogram, CT scan, echo scan and blood work.  I was feeling very happy, five years finished, this will be the last tests, no more waiting for hours in the hospital.  Went through all the tests, then went to see the doctor.  He checked the results and said everything looks good and I don't need any more medicine.  He then threw me a curve ball by saying see you next March.  I must of looked really suprised because he went on to explain that with most cancers 5 years is the end of the checks but with the type of cancer I had I have to get checks for a total of 10 years!!  I then had to wait to see another doctor about my diabetes.  Even though I haven't been very good the past few months my numbers are down and looking good.  Got to get back on the band wagon, try to cut down on sugar and carbs even more.

Hannah with my friend's baby

One of my friends stopped by the other day.  It was so nice to sit and chat for a while.  Her husband came, he has offerd to help with the garden at the othe house.  Hannah enjoyed playing with the baby.  The baby was fascinated and scared of the cats, he kept pointing at them but if they moved he would walk away!!  Very cute to watch.