Christmas Tree

 Last year I didn't have a Christmas Tree.  I left it too late to buy one, the first week of December all the Christmas stuff was finished.  This year I bought on the beginning of November.  Today Hannah and I put it up.  It's small but looks good!

the tree is up

I have to find the lights and I have other decorations to put up.

Doing this made me a little sad and very nostalgic.  I used to do three trees, the biggest in the living room, smaller one in the room I use for teaching and a small one in the entrance.  I don't bother with the living room or entrance as they wouldn't survive the cats.  Just a small one in the room where I teach.  Now the kids are grown Christmas just doesn't have the same appeal.  It's always been hard here as it isn't a holiday, but I tried to make it special.  Of course, Hisao dying one week before Christmas has made the last 10 years harder!  And this year with the cost of everything it's going to be harder but I'm trying to shift the focus to having fun family time, maybe get the board games down and play them!

I'm now 27 days with no sugar.  Down one and half kilos, not a lot but am feeling a lot better.  Couple of good things, one was I made chocolate chip muffins the other day.  I had one and was satisfied with that.  Usually, those kinds of things sing my name! But this time just one was enough!  Also I managed to walk from the dentist to the supermarket and back home.  The first time I've walked that far in years.  So slowly getting better!

Cost of Living Crisis is Real

 I've been watching Sky News for the past few months going on about the cost-of-living crisis in the UK and how this winter is going to be hard for a lot of people, having to choose between heat and eat.  I naively thought that Japan wouldn't be hit that hard.  I thought it would be the same as during the pandemic when the UK went into total lockdown, but Japan didn't.  We had one nationwide lockdown but after that it was prefecture by prefecture, if the number rose then companies and businesses were asked to close to bring the numbers down.  Because of this the economy wasn't hit as bad as in the UK.  A lot of small and medium size businesses survived and are still running today.  So, I thought it would be same with this crisis, that Japan would be hit but not so bad.  

In June and then again in October prices went up on most food stuffs.  Bread went from 65yen to 95yen, milk up by 5yen, flour has risen by 100yen the same for vegetable oil.  My weekly shop can cost between 3,000 to 5000yen more (18.00 to 30.00pounds more).  This I could deal with.  Then came the gas bill, 3000 yen more but not using any more gas.  Yesterday I got the electric bill, 22,000yen (130 pounds) for one month, twice what it was last year!  This amount is usual in the summer when I'm running air conditioner 24/7.  This time of year it is usually a lot less.  That gives me a chance to save for the winter when gas gets expensive.  I got the bill just as I was going shopping.  I felt sick to my stomach going around the shops. I noticed that a lot of people were shopping with caution.  There are very few safety nets in Japan. Welfare is based on family; you turn to family to help out before the government will help.  Even then government help is very limited. Food banks don't exist, kids can get free school lunches but it's a weird system, you have to pay then get the money back and this is only for elementary schools.  So, I am really struggling, where to save money.  I've been using cooler water to wash dishes, telling the kids not to run water when having a shower, get wet, turn off the water, shampoo and soap up and then rinse.  Now I'm wondering what to turn off to save electricity.  

One good thing is that I haven't turned to food for comfort. I'm so stressed that I feel sick and have the most awful headaches.  I'm trying to remain positive but it's hard.  Kids are good, they help out by giving me money, but I want them to save for the future.  We really don't know what is going to happen.  Back in 2019 did anybody think that we would see a worldwide pandemic that crippled the leading economies and then a war!?

I can still smile the antics of my cats.  They fight and zoom around the house, they curl up in the warmest places.  Alfie is a real lap cat; he will climb on anybody and sleep, one way of getting warm. 

Alfie sleeping on me!

And on Mikey.

Alan and Hannah.

First Eleven Days

 I stopped having sugar on the 1st. So 11 days.  The first few were hard, temptation everywhere but it has gotten easier.  A lot of the temptation came from the left-over goodies from Halloween, they have gone and I don't buy snacks.  I prefer to bake.  But I haven't done any recently.

Results:  lost a pound.  Not much but I'm still eating to many carbs.  I know it's bad but I can only deal with one thing at a time.  Sugar was the easiest to start with.  Also money is tight and what I want to buy, fruits and vegetables are too expensive.  I do buy them but not enough.  It's crazy when a small bunch of grapes cost 1,000yen (about 6 pounds), apples are about half that for 3, oranges are bit cheaper and of course bananas are always cheap.  One good thing is that I am sleeping better.  Before I was getting up to use the toilet 8 to 10 times a night.  I know that this is a sign of diabetes.  Now I can actually sleep for four or five hours, if the cats are quiet!  

I'm feeling rather proud of myself for not stress eating this past week.  The shock of the gas bill and having two students quit was very stressful.  In the past I would use this as an excuse to eat crap.  But I didn't.  I sat and cried, talked to the cats and then got on with what I had to do.  For me that is a big thing. I didn't turn to food!

Shocked

 I got the gas bill this morning.  Usually at this time of year it's about 6000 yen, about 35 pounds.  Which is reasonable for hot water and cooking for a month.  This morning's bill was 9000 yen, about 55 pounds, an increase of 3000 yen without an increase in usage.  I have no idea how much it will be once I start using the gas heaters!  At the moment we are okay as the sun warms up the main rooms and this house keeps the heat.  My biggest worry is the room I use to teach in. I don't want my students to be uncomfortable, but I don't know if I can afford heating!  I'm hoping the weather will stay mild for a few more weeks!

My business isn't doing very well either.  We usually get two or three students every month, this year we have gotten only one new one.  That is really bad.  We advertise a lot; Mikey does volunteer teaching at a lot of community centers, we have an advert in a local magazine and a homepage but nothing.  I feel desperate and it's getting me down! I've been looking to do some online work, surveys but everything is in Japanese and I can't read that much.  I guess just keep looking!

I planned to go to Costco next month for Christmas but now I'm wondering if I can justify spending a lot of money on two or three meals.  I know it's once a year but the money I spend could be used to buy food for a week.  The kids are helping.  Christopher is trying to get a second job; David buys the cat food and shops once or twice a week.  I never thought it would get this bad.  I know my family isn't the only one struggling and I still have a lot to be thankful for.  But it really sucks!!!

How are other people coping?  How are you dealing with Christmas?

Tough Few Days

 All started last Friday. Dentist appointment, need I say more.  Forty minutes of being drilled and poked, having the mold taken 3 times!  Wasn't really painful but did feel like I had been punched in the face!  Friday evening, I was munching on some crackers, lovely cheesy taste until I broke a different tooth.  This tooth already had a hole in it, at the back, so I guess it wasn't that strong, but it just snapped off, leaving a jagged edge that keeps catching my tongue or inside lip.  Planned to go to the dentist today but Sunday I got hit with the most awful allergies.  Hours of none stop sneezing and the most incredible headache.  I won't go to the dentist when my allergies are bad.  I have a fear of him drilling away and I suddenly start to sneeze!  In my imagination the outcome of that is a lot of blood! My allergies have calmed down a bit so I hope I can go tomorrow!

Also, the cats are driving me crazy.  They are fighting a lot and the zoomies are back.  During the summer it was too hot for them, so they all became very calm but now the weather is cooler they are up to their old tricks.  Last night I didn't get to sleep until 4am, either cats fighting or crying and scratching at my door!  Hope tonight is better!

Keeping warm

David and Mikey getting a selfie with Alan

One good thing, through all this I haven't binged or eaten any sugary stuff.  Tempted but managed not to!  

My Journey to Health

 I've decided to think about losing weight as a journey to a healthier me.  If I think about dieting all I get is negative thoughts.  If I think about being healthier, having more energy, regaining my mobility and not having to worry about diabetes I feel powerful.  If I think about dieting, I get the image of being deprived.  It's a mind game I know but for me the biggest obstacle is my thinking.

I started yesterday at exactly 104kgs.  First goal is to get under 100kgs.  I know I need to lose a lot more but breaking it down into smaller goals helps.  Also, if I can get the money, I am hoping to go to Osaka in March with Hannah to watch The Phantom of the Opera.  Plus do some sightseeing but all that involves walking a lot.  I've been watching these videos of itineraries of the best places to visit in Japan. Just watching makes me tired but some good ideas!

Talking of videos, I watched John Lewis Christmas 2022 CM this morning.  Made me cry!  

I watched it twice, both times I cried.  Let me know what you think!