Having a Moan

I know I have to do something about my weight!
I think about it all the time, every morning I think "Today I will eat right, I will exercise" but it never gets past that!
My health is actually pretty good for an obese woman, no cholesterol, no fat in my liver, normal blood pressure and no sign of diabetes.  But the extra weight I am carrying makes me so tired, my feet hurt and my back screams if I stand for more than half an hour.
Yesterday I went shopping with Hannah.  The shop we went to had lovely cheap T shirts.  I need load of T shirts in the summer, it gets so hot here.  But for my size I am limited in choice and everything is so expensive. 
Also I want to travel, I want to enjoy summer, go to the pool or beach but just the thought of summer makes me uncomfortable.  The past week it has started to get warm, upper 20C's, not as hot as it gets.  But I am already uncomfortable.
So I have to do something!  But if I am honest I don't want to.  I don't want to not eat the foods I enjoy, I don't want to watch my kids enjoy ice cream while I sit there watching them and I really don't want to exercise.  But what choice do I have?  None really!
So I am going to use this blog to moan about how unfair it is!  How I see other people stuffing themselves and not get fat! 
So my goal is to loose 5kgs in 6 weeks.  I can do that!  I have to do that!
From tomorrow I will stop eating at night, no munchies after work. 
I will make my dinner light and try to eat more in the mornings.  I will add some exercise as well but not sure what at the moment.
I will try to up date.  

I'm back

I never went anywhere but we lost Internet connection for a few days!
We changed our Internet provider a few months ago and have had so many problems since then.
Poor David felt so responsible for everything since he pushed to change.  He tried so hard to get things working. He managed to get out lap top to connect but I left that on all day Saturday and burnt out the adaptor.  Finally on Tuesday we managed to get a service guy to come out and fix things up. So we are back.  3 of our 7 computers are connected plus the TV is connected, so we can watch YouTube! 
Not having the Internet was very interesting experience.  I realised how much time I waste on it.  I spend far too much time just messing around on it.  But it is also very useful.  I really missed being able to just google things, questions the kids asked or looking up recipes. 

I have finally managed to get most of the house sorted.  It's a nice feeling not to be living in absolute chaos all the time.  There is still too much stuff but I've made a great headway.  It's a start!  Must keep it up!
The next thing I have to tackle is my weight.  I know I've been saying that since forever but I'm starting to see that my life is being compromised because of my weight.  I'm having problems with my feet, some days it is so painful just to walk a few meters.  So I guess I should do something! But I love my food, it comforts me, fills me when I feel empty, which is pretty often these days.  Time to grow up and be responsible for my actions.  This for me is the biggest problem with loosing weight, it's not so much the physical feeling of being hungry, that I can deal with!  It's the fact that I use food for comfort, when I'm tired, stressed, fed up or feeling miserable food, especially sweets, are there to cheer me up!  Which is great until I step on the scale or look in the mirror!  I need to look inside myself to deal with these problems in a more constructive way!
Need to sit down and talk to myself!

One Year

That's how long it has taken to get my bedroom cleaned and sorted!
This time last year David moved the furniture around.  We have 4 bedrooms so somebody has to share.  When hubby was alive we had the one room, Mikey and David had the biggest room while Hannah and Christopher had their own rooms.  After hubby died Hannah wanted to be with me, which is natural, so I decided that the boys could have their own rooms and Hannah and I would share the big room.  Great idea but moving things around took months.  Then my room became the dumping room.  Whenever there were things that we didn't know where to put they got dumped in my room.  After a year I forgot what the floor looked like.  Also my room is the last place I clean, the room for teaching gets done a lot,  the downstairs rooms get down, the kids rooms and finally my room.  By which time I have no energy!

The next problem is the garden.  One of hubby's friends is going to help.  I have ideas but don't know where to start.  I want to put grass and some nice flowers around the border.  One small place I want to grow a few vegetables and herbs, but not like before.  I don't have time for a high maintenance garden.  Simple and easy!

Hannah's Birthday

I think Hannah got totally spoiled for her birthday this year!
On Friday Mikey took to see CATS the musical.  This had been planned since February!  But what I didn't know was that Mikey planned to treat her a movie as well (her first time and she was 12).  So Friday morning Mikey and Hannah took off to the city.  They went to the Mall where the theater is and saw the Spiderman movie in 3D.  Hannah said it really woke her up.  Then they visited Mikey's friends shop and Hannah was given some money.  Then back to the mall for a special CATS cake and then the long awaited musical.  We managed to get seats on the balcony front row so they could see all of the stage.  Hannah was really impressed by it all and wants to go again!  At the end she got to shake hands with one of the Cats!
They got back really late, about 11pm.  Mikey had bought some snacks for everybody so we sat around eating, talking and laughing!
The next day I did a small party plus a birthday cake!  We watched a movie together and basically just hung out, enjoying each others company!  I'm glad my kids get on okay, for the most part!

Today Mikey and David have gone to the library.  I have to face the bedrooms.  They are really a thorn in my side, no matter how much time I spend trying to tidy up it never seems done!

A few pictures from Hannah's birthday!

MAY

How did it get to be May?  I can't believe how fast time is passing.  I feel as if we just celebrated the new year, but here we are in the fifth month!

The last two weeks of April got even more busy than usual.  I am still trying to sort out the down stairs rooms.  Managed to move the piano down room Mikey's room.  That was a big job involving moving four books shelves with all the books, reorganizing the books that we use for teaching and cleaning out where one of the book shelves were!  Big job, took 3 days.  Started on Saturday evening and finished just before teaching on Monday afternoon!

To add to my misery my insomnia kicked in!  I felt awful for about 10 days, just couldn't sleep.  I would go to bed and just lie there thinking.  I felt like I couldn't turn my brain off!  Bit better now, I can get a least 3 hours of sleep, it helps!

The kids have been busy.
Christopher has settled into his 2nd year. He had a meeting with his teacher about his future.  He hopes to get into university. The teacher encouraged him to study more and get better results on his tests!  I am pushing him as well.  Even this weekend is holiday he has to study a few hours a day!
Hannah is really into CATS the musical.  She watches the DVD at least once a week and spends hours on the Internet looking at pictures of the musical.  Today is her birthday so she is going to see CATS live with Mikey. Birthday treat.

Hannah's drawings and bead

Mikey helped out with some sort of ceremony.  We have no idea what it's called or the purpose of it!
A group of people walked the neighbourhood banging gongs and drums, very noisy but looked like fun.  Some the gongs dated back to the Edo period.  Mikey said that they were very heavy.

Mikey with the gong

 

David is working hard on his course.  He has to send in his first report soon,  I guess I won't be seeing much of him for next few days!

busy,busy,busy

It's been really busy here the past couple of weeks.  Some days it feels like non stop doing things. Christopher and Hannah are back at school.  Hannah is in the last year of elementary school and so excited.  That's good.  Christopher not so excited, he has a lot of work to do this coming year.  David has started his psychology course, so far good.  I get a lot of explanations of things.   With the kids back at school I am back to the early morning madness, up 5am to get breakfast and make a lunch box for Christopher.  Tough but no choice, makes the days VERY LONG!
Just before Hannah went back we did a bit of shopping.  That was fun.  April 1st was the day that the consumption tax increased, from 5% to 8%.  For weeks before this increase the news programmes were running so many doom and gloom stories, how people weren't go to be shopping as before but i didn't see that.  People were shopping as usual.  I got Hannah a couple of nice T shirts for the summer, a new pencil case and a few other bits and pieces!

Hannah's T shirts and pencil case.

We also got a nice surprise!   I got a letter from the education department saying that some book tokens had been sent for Hannah  from one the local businesses, Hisamitsu!  I applied for these book tokens last year, they are given to single parents in this area.  I forgot all about them but I figured that we would get maybe 2000 yen!  When I picked up the gift cards the total was 30,000 yen (about 300 dollars).  I am so happy, all the kids love to read and these will come in handy during the summer holidays.  When Hannah and Christopher start with "I'm bored"  business we can go and buy a couple of books!!

the book tokens
 

We are still cleaning out the house.  Half way there, but slow going.  The garden is still a disaster but we need to spend more time on it. One problem is that the best time is Sunday, everybody is free but it seems to rain on Sunday!!!!  Good excuse!   Last Sunday it was pouring down all day.  I took Christopher and Hannah to the local recycle shop.  Christopher got a load of T shirts and Hannah got a couple of skirts,  she likes her skirts to be below the knee so it's difficult to find nice skirts for her.  The one she really likes is no good for school as it is too long and would be dangerous on the stairs but she looks so cute in it!

Hannah looking cute in her new skirt and hat

I think that is all for now!! 

A little outing and a lot of cleaning

The kids and I went to Fukuoka on Monday! Nice day but very tiring.  Just so many people, plus we got turned around and spent ages walking in the wrong direction.  Had lunch at Moss Burgers, we don't go there very often so it was nice change.  Plus we got to watch the taxis.

It was interesting watching what kind of people took a taxi.  Also we had an interesting discussion about the lady in the red coat. Her job is to help people into the taxis,  not the best of jobs, in my opinion!

Did a bit of shopping.  The main reason I wanted to go was to check out the bookstore.  They have a good selection of books for teaching English.  I know I can order on line but I like to hold the books, get a feel for them.  Anyway we bought a few things.  I also bought Hannah some face painting crayons.  She is really into Cats the Musical and wants to try out the make up. 

Mikey had a go drawing on Hannah and Christopher

Interesting results

Other than that day out we have been busy cleaning and cleaning.
Mikey took his bed to pieces today and found where  ALL of his socks had gone to.  I got so mad because for the past couple of weeks all I've heard from Mikey was "Where are my socks?", everyday!!  They were all at the bottom of his bed.  When I saw them I yelled at Mikey, so he grabbed the socks and shoved them down the back of my T-shirt.  Not nice!  Anyway he managed to vacuum under the bed and sort out a load of stuff!!  I've gone through all my clothes and thrown away all the things that I don't wear or can't wear.  I had stuff in my draws that I bought last time I went to England, 11 years ago.  I am no longer that size or person!!  I am enjoying this process of letting go.  I have my photos and journals, the letters and notes from hubby, a few of his things, (like his glasses and watch) the PJs he wore, other than that I am letting go.  It's hard but the feeedom of not being burdened by stuff is liberating.  That is what I am enjoying!!

Christopher and Hannah have a few more days holiday and then back to school.  I hope to have some time to do something with them before the business of a new school year starts!