Cold...Again

 It's March and we had snow this morning...for a few minutes!  I was so shocked when I looked out the window and saw snow.  Hannah said it felt colder than February, which might be true. I'm not complaining, I like the cold (maybe not this cold though!).  I keep seeing on different news sites that scientists are saying this summer could be hotter than last year.  My reaction is "NO, NO, NO, don't need that!"  

One thing I like about the cold weather is being able to cook "comfort food".  Today I made chicken pie, roast potatoes and peas (too many peas!).  

Tasted great!  I also made jam tarts with the leftover pastry.

chicken pie

I've been trying to get down to zero food waste.  I'm so tired of finding food in the fridge that is out of date or vegetables that have gone bad.  David sometimes shops on the way home, which helps a lot but he has a habit of just buying what he thinks we need without checking what we have or asking me.  

To use up vegetables I've been making soups, I just throw in whatever is in the fridge and hope for the best!  Most of the time it's good.  Nice, filling, and warming!

David terrorizing Steve

Not sure what Steve did but David grabbed him. He looks totally scared.  I do know that Steve was under the table and biting my toes earlier!!

The House

 We managed to get to the house today.

When I'm here I think that there isn't so much to be done but when I get there I feel overwhelmed by just how much is left to be thrown out before cleaning and restoring the house can start. 

The weather didn't help today.  Yesterday it rained all day, so everything felt damp and we couldn't start a fire to burn some of the trash. It was so cold and cloudy making the place look dark and dismal, not a good feeling.  Also, I discovered that a lot of things in the entrance and tatami room are things we dumped there.  A lot of Hannah's toys or things from her school days.  I've decided that at this time I can't deal with the extra emotion of throwing away her stuff.  Part of it has to do with my husband. Just seeing those toys reminds me of Christmas and birthdays.  Yes, I know they aren't my husband but sentimental things are hard to let go of.  Also, I have too many strong emotions dealing with this move as it is, I can't handle any more.  So I'm going to put these things in our storage area and when we have settled in take time to go through them and say goodbye.  Let them go slowly.  I feel for me that is the best.  Maybe in the grand scheme of things, not a good idea but I don't know what else to do.  

Hannah yelled at me.  I found a box of clothes that I packed up and put there.  I started to look through the box, but Hannah caught me and told me off.  She said that I had decided that the stuff in the box wasn't worth keeping and I should just throw away and not go through it again.  She's good to have when sorting out things!

Managed to get the shoe box sorted.  There must have been about 50 pairs of shoes!  Most belonged to my mother-in-law but I found some that belonged to my brother-in-law, he passed away before I came to Japan, so over 33 years but she was still hanging on to his stuff.

I also found a lovely set of geta (Japanese shoes) and a bag.  We took it to a recycle shop but they weren't interested in it.  When I checked after I could see that the bottom of the shoes looked worn.

Looks nice but the bottoms are scuffed

Took some photos of the back of the house.  Having all the bamboo taken down has made a big difference.

bathroom windows

The door leads into the bathroom!!

One of the bedrooms

Looks like I'll have to check the wood next time.

I'm also suffering from bad allergies, I've been sniffling and sneezing all day.  It's that time of year!!

February

 Happy Leap Year Day.

I don't know if that is a thing but maybe it should be!

I know February is the shortest month but it seemed very long.  I think people being sick didn't help.  Mikey started with a high fever, which lasted just 24 hours but then he had a week of sneezing and runny nose, maybe the start of allergies.  Then Christopher got a high fever, I thought it was the same thing but his fever lasted a few days. He then got a sore throat, so we thought he had tonsillitis, so he went off to the doctors only to find out he had B-type flu.  I wasn't happy about that as I usually isolate anybody who has flu but Christopher had been downstairs with us.  He was lucky as his symptoms were very mild.  Then Mikey got a sore throat again but no fever, which lasted a couple of days. David and Hannah escaped this time.  I haven't been sick but my allergies have started!

Hannah quit her part-time job at the local drugstore.  Although the fourth year of her course doesn't have so many taught lessons she has to write her thesis.  I thought that was the main reason for her quitting, but it turns out that two of the staff have been ignoring her.  Hannah said that these ladies are in their 40s but acting like teenagers.  Anyway, Hannah has another part-time job lined up to start in April.  She is going to work in one of the nurseries where Mikey teaches English.  I think it's a better fit for her.  

I haven't done as much as I had hoped on getting things sorted to move.  Cleaned out half of one cupboard, something I guess. Must focus from next month.  Time is not going to slow down!

I hope that March is better that I can get focused on doing things to make the move easier! 

Just a cute cat photo to finish.

Steve talking to the stray that hangs about

Memories

I think there will be a few posts with this or similar titles.  As I'm down sizing I find things that trigger a nostalgic feeling. Some good memories, some not so good and some bad!  This house was where my kids transitioned from children to teens to adults.  It's where my husband died and I had to cope with everything while grieving.  It's where I got cancer and ended up in hospital for a week, and still having checks every few months.  Fifteen years, lots of memories, lots of feelings.

This morning I was talking to one of my students about raising children.  She was telling me that her commute to work was over 90 minutes and that coming home she would spend as much time as possible with her children.  One thing she did was read to her children at night or make up stories to tell them.  I remember doing this as well.  I was lucky in that I could work at home but when I was working I would focus on that.  To be honest I would sometimes feel rather resentful that I had to spend time teaching other people's kids when I wanted to be with mine, especially if the kids were rather obnoxious.  

My husband would take care of bath time.  It's a tradition in Japan to have a bath every night, not just a shower, but soak in the tub.  When the kids were little it was a good play time for them.  They would come out all wrinkly, having spent up an hour in the water.  They would then have a snack and drink, brush teeth and either watch TV or read until I had finished teaching.  I would get into bed with them and read a book or two or three until they dozed off.  Sometimes they would wake up and ask for me to finish the story.  As they got older I would read longer books to them, Roald Dahl was popular and later the Harry Potter books.  Even though I was so tired some nights I'm glad I did it as all my kids love to read and I have so many good memories from that time.

A few of the books I used to read to my kids.

These I'm keeping!  There's another one that I want to find.  It's one I took and read to Hannah everyday she was in the NICU.

A lot of the other books I can let go of, but these are so precious to me!

Non Scale Victory

 I've been trying to lose weight for as long as I can remember. My life is dominated by numbers, how many kilos down this week, how many centimeters off my waist.  It's so depressing.  The scales aren't accurate in showing if I've dropped a bit or not.  Sometimes even eating clean (no sugar, no processed food and little carbs) for 10 days but the scale shows a 3 kilo increase, mainly because my water intake wasn't that much.  Or I eat bad and drop about 2 kilos. So I look for other ways to measure my health and fitness.  Yesterday was a victory for me.  Maybe a small thing for other people but huge for me.

I walked to the City Hall from my house.  It's not far, about 300 meters but the last time I walked, before I started to exercise, I was in so much pain, just going about 100 meters my back, hip and knee were screaming.  This time I got to the City Hall, a little out of breath, but I was walking fast (very windy, cold and trying to rain) and I was talking to Christopher.  Had to walk around the City Hall to find the place I needed, got to sit for a few minutes while things were sorted out, then I went to the supermarket opposite the City Hall, walked around there and then back home.  I was shocked to see how much difference about 10 days of exercise made.  I'm only doing 10 minutes a day, of seated exercise, at the moment but I'm hoping to increase it as I feel better.  I want to say thank you again to my friend who challenged me, without that challenge I wouldn't be feeling so good.

Plans

I had a great plan today. Mikey, Christopher, Hannah and I were going to go to the other house and do a lot. I was going to throw out the rest of the stuff still in the house, burn as much as possible, and put the rest in the shed to be taken to the trash place.  I made these plans last week when the weather was cold and dry.  Although it's hard working in the house when it's cold, having a fire going helps, every hour or so go and warm up and start again.  The weather changed over the weekend, Sunday saw the temperature rise, Monday was warm and rainy.  Bit more difficult to work, can't burn stuff but with the temperatures up to 20C I could do some things inside, bring all the stuff to the big windows (more like sliding doors), and then the next visit just take the stuff out.  But of course, the weather changed again, Thursday and today back to winter, high of 8C and rain.  I woke up this morning trying to decide if it was worth the 40-minute drive when Mikey called me.  He has a sore throat and feels really awful.  So we didn't bother going.  I'm trying not to panic but there is so much to do at both houses and I feel like no time.  I know the problem is me, I don't want to move there so I keep putting off doing stuff.  It's not helping though.  Also, we only have one car and Mikey uses it a lot for his other jobs.  

Another worry is money.  I'm not making that much teaching.  David buys most of the food and cat stuff, Christopher and Hannah help out.  Mikey does as well.  But I always seem to be short.  I need to save to pay for things, even if we do most of the DIY ourselves we need to buy things.  Also, David and Christopher will have to get new jobs and that isn't easy. David will need his own car but I don't know how he can afford that.  Christopher needs to check his eyesight to see if he can get a driver's license.  Another worry!!  I don't want these young men stuck in that house.  They are too young to live a life of being in the house all the time with nothing to do!  I have so many regrets with my kids, so many nights I cry myself to sleep wishing I had done things differently. I know it doesn't help but that's where my mind is at.

Mama hiding

This was where we found Mama, we had a very bad thunderstorm, she gets in the shoe cupboard to hide from it.

Challenge

 After my last post on exercise, one of my friends challenged me to do 40 days of exercise.  I'm on day three and feeling awful but good!!  There is a saying in Japanese "Mika hi boz", which means giving up after 3 days.  The saying comes from Japanese Buddhism, becoming a monk is very hard so most people give up after 3 days!  I'm not giving up!  I can't give up.  I dread doing the exercises, I've found a channel on YouTube that has different levels of exercise, most for seniors or beginners, a lot of chair exercises, which I'm doing at the moment.  I feel good after but just getting going seems hard!  I'm not sure why!  Forty days takes me until March 21st, I think!  So I have to keep on! 

The reason I feel awful is the weather. It has suddenly changed.  Last week was cold, it didn't get over 10C all week, then suddenly we had rain (and a thunderstorm yesterday morning) and highs of 20C.  I feel really wiped out, the air pressure is low and giving me headaches!  Feels like spring has started!  I'm a bit worried as feeling this tired with the humidity and temperatures just up 20C, how will I cope in the real summer!  

The past couple of days I've been sorting out cupboards again, which is tiring physically and emotionally. I have to downsize, my brain knows this but my heart doesn't want to let go! I keep telling myself that the things I'm dumping are just things but it still isn't easy.  Part of it is letting go of things with more memories.  The first lot of stuff I threw out was stuff that I didn't have an attachment to, so a lot easier.  But as I throw out the easy stuff the harder it gets  Does that make sense?  For example, I have a lot of books I bought for my kids to study English, they've been used but are now just taking up.   space.  I bought these when Hannah was a year old, we visited England to see Mom as she had terminal cancer, so 21 years ago!  Part of the problem is I can remember Mom looking through them,  that was the last time I saw Mom as she passed away a year later!  When I pick them up I can hear her voice as she read passages from them.  I know these books aren't Mom but the memories they evoke are so special. I knew this move would be hard and we haven't even got to the crunch but even now it's so painful.

Have to keep going, no choice!

I made lasagna the other day.  Not that healthy but very nice.  I overcooked it a bit!

Overcooked lasagna

Soon it'll be too hot to make these kinds of meals so I'm doing a lot now!