Running Errands

Sounds simple doesn't it?  But not when you can't drive or deal with things because of language!

First of all my Japanese is bad but I can deal with most daily things. What I had to do today I needed help.

The first stop was the dry cleaners.  I think this was the second time to use dry cleaners! I try not to buy things that need dry cleaning. 

The clothes that I wanted cleaned are a dress and jacket set that I'm hoping to wear for Mikey's wedding. I wanted to buy something new but I don't really have money. I saw a lovely outfit, maybe my size and not too expensive. I was going to order it but if it doesn't fit I can't return it!  The dress and jacket I have are nice, I bought them a few years ago but have only worn them two or three times. I'm hoping that having them cleaned will make them feel fresh and new! If not I still have time to buy something else.

I thought that I would just hand over the clothes and get a ticket to pick them up. Of course not, that would be too easy. The staff started talking about a member's card and how I could get different discounts. I have a few heavy blankets and futons that need to be cleaned, so I decided to get the member's card. This involved filling out a form, which Christopher did for me!  One problem is remembering our new address, we are still having problems with that!

This was outside the cleaners.

Interesting sign

I hope they don't make my clothes white!!!

Next stop was the bank. I needed to change my address, get a new cash card, and find out why my debit card wasn't working.

Changing my address was easy enough.  Getting a new cash card, not too bad. But the debit card was a nightmare. I tried to use it on Amazon but it got rejected. Turns out that there was no money in the bank. I didn't use this bank very much, I had another bank that took care of paying the rent, everything else I used cash for!  When the staff checked my account it turns out that I used the debit card to pay for something monthly back in 2020 and 2021. But I have no idea what. Maybe some subscription. The staff advised me to call the debit card company. Problem is that they can only give information to me and I'm even worse on the phone!  Need to figure something out for that.

The last place was city hall. Mikey and I get a bit of money from the city for the volunteer class we do, I think it's to cover travel expenses. We had to give them my banking information so the money can be paid straight into the bank. That was quick. 

I'm glad that these things are finished.  No a lot to do but took most of the afternoon.

Tomorrow is Hannah's graduation. It's going to be a long day! I'm looking forward to seeing her graduate but wondering if I'll survive being out all day!  The hall opens at 9:30, the ceremony starts at 10:30, and finishes at about 12:50.  Hannah has to go back to her university to change out of her hakama, then she'll go home to get ready for the evening. Christopher and I will get lunch then go to the city where I have a class and wait for Mikey to pick us up.  Teaching finishes at 9:30pm on Tuesday!  Just writing that has made me feel tired!

Cute cat photo. Sam looked cold so he got covered!

Ageing

Listening to my hairdresser the other day has given me a lot to ponder! At 76, she is still healthy, able to work, and excited to learn new things! I'm 14 years younger but already feel like my time to do new things is finished.

So where have I gotten this idea that in my 60s I'm finished and just waiting around to die?

Part of it might be my background. Growing up in the UK we were told that women retire at 60. The feeling I got was that a woman's usefulness finished at 60. I know that some women enjoyed their retirement but from the people around me retirement was a time of financial struggle and not having much hope for anything better. I guess working-class Britain was like that in the 1970s!

So that is part of my thinking! Negative stereotypes that I grew up with!

But there must be more to it than that!  I know that images, and experiences that we have from childhood shape our thinking but the depth of feeling that I have about my life being over at 60 is more than that!

When we were told that we had to leave the other house I remember clearly thinking that I was too old to start again. That I would be too old to deal with the stress and physical work of moving and living here!  That it wouldn't be worth the effort to remodel the house as I wouldn't be around to enjoy it!

I think part of that thinking wasn't just about growing old but more to do with my negative mind set. My constant feeling of lack, that I don't have enough time, energy or money to enjoy things. That instead of living in gratitude for what I have, I live in despair for what I don't have or can't get!

Listening to my hairdresser made me realize that we have to ability to change ourselves, to be more than we were before, and that I'm letting myself and my kids down by thinking I'm too old, too fat, too sick, or too poor to do anything! I know she had a hard time a few years back, her husband got sick,  but she has managed to keep her business going, and more than that she is finding ways to learn new things and has a feeling of excitement for that.

I have 3 ages. The age I think I am, in my 30s, the age my body feels like most days, in my 90s, and my real age of 62!  So I need to make my body feel closer to my real age and tell my brain to stop making grandiose plans that I can't do. I want to learn new things, to stretch myself mentally, to find confidence in my own ability. When I was talking to Hannah about this she said I should learn Japanese. Which is true but feels like a chore! I want to try something artistic. I saw on Facebook a group for coloring, it looks like coloring is a popular hobby so I might start there!

Today has been another rainy day! Even the cats are not chasing around so much. Mama, Alan, and Toast are curled up on the sofa, keeping warm! It really is a cat's life!

Cat's life!!

I have to go and wash dishes, and get the kitchen cleaned. That's something that hasn't changed, no matter where I live or how old I am there will always be dishes!

When I was searching about ageing I came across this quote, which about sums it up!

"Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter." – Mark Twain

What Happened....

 ...to spring?

Last week, we enjoyed lovely weather: temperatures in the mid-teens Celsius, a few evening showers, and soft breezes. Today, we are back to freezing temperatures, rain, and gale-force winds!

I had plans for this weekend. Since everyone is at home, I thought we could spend a couple of hours in the garden this morning and tomorrow morning, but when I saw the weather, that plan flew out the window.

Rainy day

poor blossoms

So I changed my plans and went shopping, which was a big mistake! Everything is so expensive!  The supermarket was busy as it was a sales day but the sales prices weren't that cheap! The best bargain was the eggs, about half the price I usually pay.

I planned to go to two or three different places but couldn't deal with standing there trying to decide if I should buy something or not. I'm not talking about luxury items or expensive import foods but daily food that I can't afford!  

Came home and got lunch, which turned out better than I thought it would.

I made 3 colors donburi, this is an obento recipe but it works well as a quick lunch.

3 color donburi

The meat is ground (minced) chicken flavored with soy sauce, sake, mirin and sugar. I added a bit of grated ginger to make it more warming. Scrambled eggs, some recipes use sugar to make the eggs sweet but I add a couple of drops of soy sauce and takana, pickles made from Japanese mustard greens. I've seen green peas used for the green part of the dish. This is served over rice! Quick to make, tasty, and very filling. 

David bought a few more plants and started them in containers. But we really need to clear a space as soon as possible. I can do some of the cutting down of the bushes and trees if they are small enough but I need muscle power to get the roots up and to turn over the soil. I'm determined to have a good vegetable garden!

I'm making some nice soup for dinner. One good thing about the cold is that I can make nice, warming meals!

I Did It

 I got my hair cut and colored.

I don't go to the hairdressers very often, it's an expense that I can't really afford but I was starting to look like a wild woman. It was over a year ago that I went last time!

It looks better but feels strange. My hair had grown very long, now it's short and off my neck, I keep thinking something is missing! Also, my neck is cold!

better hair, terrible face

I'm hopeless at taking selfies, I never know where to look. Also my face is puffy from lack of sleep and allergies. But my hair is a lot better!

And I got a discount! I've been going to this hairdresser for years, maybe since Mikey was a baby!  I tried a few other places but always came back to this place. I like the way they do my hair.

Mikey took me, then sat and waited while the hairdresser was working on me. Like most hairdressers she is very chatty. She was talking to us for a long time. Many stories of how her business has changed over the years. She was saying that when she and her sister first opened they were busy in January, March, and April. They used to do make-up as well as hairdressing. January was busy for The Coming Of Age Day Ceremony. Kids who have turned twenty are considered adults, there's a ceremony in January that celebrates that!  A lot of girls would rent a kimono and have their hair and make-up done professionally. This time of year there is for graduating and April is the start of a new school year with entrance ceremonies. She said that over the last 10 years, those appointments have gone down. A lot of rental kimono places do the girl's hair as part of the package. Also, she saw a decline in doing make-up and hair for wedding parties, most people use an all-inclusive package from a wedding hall.  

One thing that has amazed me about this lady is her youthful attitude. She's 76 years old but still opens her shop 3 or 4 days a week, depending on her appointments.  She has a lovely style, casual but very smart looking, she wears colors, which is unusual for older ladies in Japan. My mother-in-law told me that after 60 you shouldn't wear bright colors!  Also, this lady is still learning. On the table was a high school math book. Mikey asked about this, and she said that she was trying to see how much she could remember and how much had changed. She went on to tell us that she's excited to start piano lessons next month! She wanted to have piano lessons before but didn't have the time or money so she's taking the chance now.

I was blown away by her attitude!  I'm 62 and feel that it's too late to start anything new and that my time for learning has passed. That I should stop working and just hang around the house.  

Her stories and her desire to learn new things have given me a lot to think about.

So I'm thinking about all the things that I wished I had done when I was younger.  Maybe it isn't too late to learn a new skill, to improve on my teaching and get new students. To do more every day, to live life to the fullest!

I have to work on my health, that has to be the starting point, get healthier to do all these things. I'm a bit worried about how tired I get commuting to the other city a couple of times a week. So I need to figure out how to deal with that, to have the energy to commute and teach. Step by step.

It's time to stop saving things for later and start doing them! I have a habit of finding interesting books, web pages or free on line courses to study but instead of studying I just save them for later. Well, now is later. Let's start!

I Wasn't Tired

I was sick!

After I finished writing yesterday I decided to lie down a bit more, thinking that I would be alright to go and teach later. 

But I ended up running to the toilet every 10 minutes! I'd picked up a stomach bug! Both David and Christopher have been sick with it, I was hoping that I would escape it but I didn't! It's just a 48-hour bug, nothing serious but you have to stay near a toilet. So I stayed home, slept, and read a bit. I feel a lot better today and actually have some energy! 

I realize that I overthink things. Next Tuesday is Hannah's graduation and I'm freaking out because we have to go by train, bus, and taxi. The train is okay but I can't figure out which bus to take. I spent ages this morning looking on Google Maps but it keeps telling me that there is no bus to the university. I know the bus doesn't go to the campus but there is a stop nearby but I can't figure it out. I have four days to find out this bus number and the name of the stop but I'm already worrying. Why do I do this to myself? I'm going with Christopher, he can ask at the station which bus to take and if we can't get one then we can use a taxi. But my brain just wants to freak out at something. I need to sit and give myself a good talking-to!!

All the lovely blossoms are starting to fall. I thought it was snowing this morning but it was the blossoms being blown down. It's interesting watching the garden come to life. Every day there is something new to see. Also there are a lot of birds around, some mornings it gets to be very noisy. 

Just a few photos from the garden.

From the driveway

camellia bush starting to flower

Another pretty one that I don't know the name of

It's A Cats Life

 I want to be a cat.

No work, no responsibilities, sleep all day, nice treats, and a bit of playtime!!

Fun!  

Cat's Life

I'm overtired. Last week was busy, with four trips to the other city and starting to exercise. I thought that a good rest on Monday would be enough for me, but it wasn't. I couldn't wake up this morning, I feel sick and have a headache but have to go again today and tomorrow plus I have an appointment to have my hair done on Friday.  Next week is going to be worse as it's Hannah's graduation on Tuesday and I want to attend.

I'll have to go by train, bus and taxi.  Christopher is coming with me, which will help but it's going to be a full day out!  I won't be able to go home as I have an evening class as well. Looks like I'll be out from 8am to about 10:30 pm.

Looking at my cats, all curled up, gently snoring I think it's a good life. But maybe that depends on the owner. My cats have a good life because we spoil them. As I'm writing this David is putting some boiled eggs for Mama cat, she loves boiled eggs.

I know things aren't that bad, I'm just tired. I'm trying so hard to be positive and grateful. Can I keep thinking positive thoughts and being grateful when I'm so tired? That's the challenge, it's easy when things are going well but when life feels tough then it's easy to fall back into the old miserable, complaining mindset! 

So I'll paste on a smile and behave as if everything is great and get through today!

Great East Japan Earthquake

 On March 11th, 2011 at approximately 2:45 in the afternoon a magnitude 9 earthquake struck off the Pacific Coast of Japan. This was the largest earthquake to ever hit Japan and the 3rd largest in the world since 1900. The earthquake caused a massive tsunami, which in turn caused the disaster at the Fukushima nuclear power plant.  

Lessons are learned each time a major disaster hits. Pressing needs such as dealing with people who have lost homes,  who need a place to stay, food, and water to survive the first 48 hours.  Making sure that medical supplies can get in. That rescue efforts aren't hampered by the destruction of infrastructure. Then longer-term solutions such as temporary housing, rebuilding of schools, hospitals, and industry. One big change that occurred was the way relief is sent to affected areas. Before the local governments had to request aid, but in the March 11th disaster many local government buildings were destroyed meaning that there was no way to request aid. Now aid is sent without request, the central government will just send aid as soon as possible.  This means that help arrives at the disaster area a lot faster.

Japan is a country that is prone to natural disasters. Every year there are earthquakes, tsunamis, volcanic eruptions, typhoons, and now wildfires! Every time a disaster hits I often wonder how do people survive, not just physically but emotionally or mentally. How do you pick yourself up and restart life?

I live at the opposite end of the country from where the March 11th earthquake hit. I actually didn't know it was happening until one of my students came to class crying.  His father was in Tokyo and the family hadn't been able to contact him.  I told the student not to worry, that Japan is used to these earthquakes and I'm sure his Dad was okay (he was but no cell reception for a few days). The student told me to check the TV, so I did. I was horrified at what I saw. The tsunami had already hit many places, houses were being tossed about like toy boats. Sendai Airport had water up to the walkways for the planes. The images were unreal! 

As things calmed down, rescue squads were sent in to help with the recovery of bodies and the slim chance that they might find survivors. One of my students at that time was a firefighter. He was sent about a week after the disaster to help.  I asked what it was like. He said that the images on the TV were very accurate but what got him was the smell.  The whole area smelt like salt water mixed with decaying bodies of both people and animals. He said that even as a veteran firefighter he was freaked out by the absolute destruction.

As I watched this unfold on the TV my one thought was how do you start again?  I've been fortunate to have never been in such a disaster. The closet we got was a few years later when a magnitude 7 hit just 3 hours drive from here. 

The Japanese, as a people, have the mindset to "gambaru", to persevere, to keep going, and not give up. During the earthquake near here, I heard a reporter describe the Japanese as being very stoic. They accept what has happened, are glad to be alive, and know that they can rebuild. I think living in a country like Japan that is a good attitude to have. 

Every year on the anniversary of the disaster there are reports from the area, showing how much as been rebuilt, how people are coping with life, accepting the grief of loss, both on a personal level but also as a community. 

On the tenth anniversary, they had a special program interviewing people who rebuilt in an area where the tsunami was very bad. One family owned farming land, therefore they couldn't move away. They built a new house and restarted their farm business. When asked if she was afraid the mother of the family answered, "Yes, but I have no choice, this is our life here"  That is the kind of attitude that most Japanese people have.

The idea of starting after loss stayed with me for a long time. I often thought about how I would cope and felt that I wouldn't do that well. Then in December 2012, I found out the hard way when Hisao suddenly passed away. I know that this was small compared to what people in the area went through. I lost my husband but still have my kids, friends, a place to live, and a business. A lot of those people lost everything. But loss is loss. I learned that inner strength comes when you need it. That somehow you find a way to get up every day and do what you have to. I learned that grief is overwhelming and it's better to embrace it instead of ignoring it. It doesn't go away, I still grieve for Hisao, but it becomes more manageable. I learned that just putting one foot in front of another each and every day gets you somewhere, maybe not the future you dreamed of but a new future that you can create.  I learned to celebrate everything, from the smallest thing, such as the kids getting good scores on their tests or finding a cheaper supermarket to the big milestones of birthdays, graduations, and entrance ceremonies. To live a life that is full. Full of good friends and family, full of laughs and daftness, full of tears and frustration. That everything is precious, even the things we don't want. such as moving here, can be a life lesson. 

Today I will say a prayer for those who died in that awful disaster. I will say a prayer for those who kept going, that their hearts can be eased and that they can find some kind of peace.  

Sorry no photos today!