It was Vernal Equinox Day, the day when the night and day are the same length.
The holiday goes back to ancient times, when the spring equinox was tied to agricultural rituals and crop planting. Later, when Buddhism had a strong influence on society, the day became associated with Higan, a week-long period where people honored their ancestors, usually visiting graves to clean them and offer flowers and incense. The Vernal Equinox became a national holiday in 1948 when Japan secularized a lot of its holidays after World War 2. For most people, it's a chance to get back to nature. Where we live, the weather suddenly changed yesterday, from freezing and snow to warm breezes! David said that on the news the last effort of winter to hold on is usually called "General Winter's last march", kind of poetic!
When my kids were little, we watched one of Winne the Pooh's movies, I have no idea which one, but the story centered around having a party on the first day of spring. I thought this was such a lovely idea that for many years we would have a party on this day. Schools finish for the year at the end of March, so this party was also to celebrate another year in school finished. Just before starting school in April, we would have another little party to get the new school year off to a good start!
I really miss those days! When cooking up a few treats made the kids excited, it was so simple!
I guess this season of graduating and moving on has made me a bit nostalgic for the past!
The photo is from Christopher's birthday. But this would be how we would have parties, lots of good food, and usually a video to watch together.
Christophers birthday
I'll have to look at my photos to see if I have any from our spring parties!
Yesterday I was exhausted from my trip to the city for Hannah's graduation. I knew I was going to be tired so I planned a nothing day. I did a few things, but not much. I went to bed at 11pm, thinking I could get a good sleep then today I could do all these chores that are niggling at me. But the cats decided not to cooperate!
Steve and Alfie were practicing for Britain's Got Talent, and they decided that the acoustics outside my door were the best.
Steve and Alfie!
And I think Fred and Frodo were preparing for a mixed martial arts competition!
Frodo
And Fred
So this morning I was tired and had no energy to do anything! Another day of resting!
I know that I could of pushed myself to do things but I would end up feeling ill and being rather grumpy!
So two wasted days.
I've also been thinking about the amount of time I spend on social media. I did a quick search, and the average time is two and a half hours a day. I don't think I'm that bad, but I do know that sometimes I start scrolling through Instagram and find that half an hour has gone without me realizing it.
The other two sites that get me are YouTube and Pinterest. They are so easy to get lost in them. So many interesting ideas, so much information and so much misinformation!
I'm trying to be more aware of how I spend my time. There are things that I have to do, chores, teaching, and hopefully gardening, if the weather decides to cooperate! There are things I want to do, reading, studying, baking, and trying some new hobbies. I should focus on those things instead of mindless scrolling through other people's lives. I've realized that I watch a lot of videos of how people are living in Japan. A few ladies who are a similar age to me, living slow lives. They are Japanese, so I watch with subtitles but also try to listen to what they are saying. I can justify it as a way to study Japanese. Other videos are foreigners living in Japan. The foreigner videos seem to have similar themes, setting up an apartment or shopping! I was watching one last night, halfway through I was wondering why am I watching this, I go shopping in Japan every week!!
So I'm going to be more mindful of how I spend my time. Try to get things done when I don't have to travel to the other city for lessons. We've been in this house since December, and it still doesn't feel like home. As we settle in I'm finding more problems, more things that need to be seen to or fixed. And a lot more cleaning, things that were missed the first time round! So a lot of work, no more wasting time!!!
Christopher and I traveled to the city by train and then made a mad dash for the bus! I got to practice my speed walking!!
Unfortunately, the weather was bad, very cold, rainy, and windy; it actually snowed later on!
The bus we got said that the stop was in front of the venue. The bus company's idea of in front of something and mine were very different! I was expecting to see the building and just walk through a parking lot. Instead, we got off at a busy street that was more residential than city buildings. Christopher had his phone, but it was difficult to read the map as the rain was very heavy then. We were dashing from shelter to shelter, trying to figure out which way to go. I was worried about being late. According to the map, it was a six-minute walk from the stop. I often wonder how they figure out how many minutes it takes to walk from one place to another. I don't think they use a 62-year-old woman with a bad knee as a model for walking speed. It took us more like 15 minutes to get to the building.
I thought Hannah would already be there, but she was still on a shuttle bus from her university.
She arrived a few minutes after us. I didn't recognize her at first. With her hair and make-up done and wearing a hakama she looked very different. And very beautiful!
Selfies from Hannah
Hannah's hakama
with me feeling very proud
with Christopher
ribbon on the back of her hair
Waiting to go in
outside the hall
The ceremony started at 10:30. The graduates sat at the front of the auditorium. Parents and guests sat behind.
The banner is the name of the university and the year of graduation
On the left are university staff, on the right (blocked by the lady's head) are special guests.
First they read out how many students were graduating from each department. Then, a representative student was called to collect their diploma.
This is the student who represented Hannah's course.
This took a long time.
Then came the speeches. I tried to focus and understand what was being said, but I was sleepy, rather warm, and comfortable. I kind of dozed off!! I have the excuse that I can't catch all the Japanese, as it tends to be rather formal, but I wonder what excuses other people had?! I noticed a lot of people dozing off during the speeches.
After the main ceremony, Hannah's course and another course were asked to stay behind to receive their diplomas and licenses. Hannah now has a license to teach in elementary school and at a special needs school.
Hannah getting her diploma
With two of her teachers
The sign says about the graduation
I had called Mikey while I was waiting for Hannah to finish. He was kind enough to come and pick us up, which really helped.
We took Hannah to the kimono shop so she could change out of the hakama. Of course, things didn't go as planned. The building where you change is separate from the kimono shop. You have to take off your shoes to go in. After Hannah changed, she called me. Somebody had taken Hannah's boots by mistake. Staff knew who went into the building at the same time as Hannah, so they could call her. A few minutes later, the girl came back and exchanged boots. We thought it was rather funny!
After that, we had a quick lunch. Nothing fancy, but we enjoyed it. Hannah said it was nice to eat something that she didn't have to cook. I felt the same way.
At lunch
Nice and simple
After that we dropped Hannah off at her apartment and we made our way back to teach.
The weather got really bad. The rain had turned to snow, and was really coming down! The video doesn't show how bad it was!
We got to the city in time to start our classes.
We didn't get back home until 10:30 at night, long day!
The course that Hannah graduated from had a party/dinner in the evening.
Hannah sent me loads of photos. I think it was a nice way to say goodbye to friends who had been together for four years!
From her class
With her teacher
selfies again
It was a nice day! Exhausting but wonderful. Happy and sad. On these days like this, I really miss Hisao!
I'm very proud of Hannah. The past four years have seen her grow up so much! When she started it was at the time of the pandemic. For the first year, most of her classes were online. We didn't know if she would have a real university experience, if all four years would be online or not. But as we got over the pandemic and things went back to normal, she started having classes and meetings at university. She did her one-month teacher's training. During that time, she realized that as much as she enjoys teaching elementary school children, the workload, the attitude of both parents and kids, and the way new subjects are added to the curriculum, that job wasn't for her. She decided to go to graduate school and get her license to teach at junior high school. She has managed to work part-time, usually two different jobs at the same time to make money for everything!
In April, she will start her graduate course. She is already thinking about her thesis!
I'm hoping the next three years will be good for her and she can go on to become an English teacher in junior high school.
I got lucky as my student today canceled her class, so I could rest a bit! I'm glad, as I was so tired last night! According to my fit app I did over 5000 steps yesterday! Good but exhausting!
Sounds simple doesn't it? But not when you can't drive or deal with things because of language!
First of all my Japanese is bad but I can deal with most daily things. What I had to do today I needed help.
The first stop was the dry cleaners. I think this was the second time to use dry cleaners! I try not to buy things that need dry cleaning.
The clothes that I wanted cleaned are a dress and jacket set that I'm hoping to wear for Mikey's wedding. I wanted to buy something new but I don't really have money. I saw a lovely outfit, maybe my size and not too expensive. I was going to order it but if it doesn't fit I can't return it! The dress and jacket I have are nice, I bought them a few years ago but have only worn them two or three times. I'm hoping that having them cleaned will make them feel fresh and new! If not I still have time to buy something else.
I thought that I would just hand over the clothes and get a ticket to pick them up. Of course not, that would be too easy. The staff started talking about a member's card and how I could get different discounts. I have a few heavy blankets and futons that need to be cleaned, so I decided to get the member's card. This involved filling out a form, which Christopher did for me! One problem is remembering our new address, we are still having problems with that!
This was outside the cleaners.
Interesting sign
I hope they don't make my clothes white!!!
Next stop was the bank. I needed to change my address, get a new cash card, and find out why my debit card wasn't working.
Changing my address was easy enough. Getting a new cash card, not too bad. But the debit card was a nightmare. I tried to use it on Amazon but it got rejected. Turns out that there was no money in the bank. I didn't use this bank very much, I had another bank that took care of paying the rent, everything else I used cash for! When the staff checked my account it turns out that I used the debit card to pay for something monthly back in 2020 and 2021. But I have no idea what. Maybe some subscription. The staff advised me to call the debit card company. Problem is that they can only give information to me and I'm even worse on the phone! Need to figure something out for that.
The last place was city hall. Mikey and I get a bit of money from the city for the volunteer class we do, I think it's to cover travel expenses. We had to give them my banking information so the money can be paid straight into the bank. That was quick.
I'm glad that these things are finished. No a lot to do but took most of the afternoon.
Tomorrow is Hannah's graduation. It's going to be a long day! I'm looking forward to seeing her graduate but wondering if I'll survive being out all day! The hall opens at 9:30, the ceremony starts at 10:30, and finishes at about 12:50. Hannah has to go back to her university to change out of her hakama, then she'll go home to get ready for the evening. Christopher and I will get lunch then go to the city where I have a class and wait for Mikey to pick us up. Teaching finishes at 9:30pm on Tuesday! Just writing that has made me feel tired!
Cute cat photo. Sam looked cold so he got covered!
Listening to my hairdresser the other day has given me a lot to ponder! At 76, she is still healthy, able to work, and excited to learn new things! I'm 14 years younger but already feel like my time to do new things is finished.
So where have I gotten this idea that in my 60s I'm finished and just waiting around to die?
Part of it might be my background. Growing up in the UK we were told that women retire at 60. The feeling I got was that a woman's usefulness finished at 60. I know that some women enjoyed their retirement but from the people around me retirement was a time of financial struggle and not having much hope for anything better. I guess working-class Britain was like that in the 1970s!
So that is part of my thinking! Negative stereotypes that I grew up with!
But there must be more to it than that! I know that images, and experiences that we have from childhood shape our thinking but the depth of feeling that I have about my life being over at 60 is more than that!
When we were told that we had to leave the other house I remember clearly thinking that I was too old to start again. That I would be too old to deal with the stress and physical work of moving and living here! That it wouldn't be worth the effort to remodel the house as I wouldn't be around to enjoy it!
I think part of that thinking wasn't just about growing old but more to do with my negative mind set. My constant feeling of lack, that I don't have enough time, energy or money to enjoy things. That instead of living in gratitude for what I have, I live in despair for what I don't have or can't get!
Listening to my hairdresser made me realize that we have to ability to change ourselves, to be more than we were before, and that I'm letting myself and my kids down by thinking I'm too old, too fat, too sick, or too poor to do anything! I know she had a hard time a few years back, her husband got sick, but she has managed to keep her business going, and more than that she is finding ways to learn new things and has a feeling of excitement for that.
I have 3 ages. The age I think I am, in my 30s, the age my body feels like most days, in my 90s, and my real age of 62! So I need to make my body feel closer to my real age and tell my brain to stop making grandiose plans that I can't do. I want to learn new things, to stretch myself mentally, to find confidence in my own ability. When I was talking to Hannah about this she said I should learn Japanese. Which is true but feels like a chore! I want to try something artistic. I saw on Facebook a group for coloring, it looks like coloring is a popular hobby so I might start there!
Today has been another rainy day! Even the cats are not chasing around so much. Mama, Alan, and Toast are curled up on the sofa, keeping warm! It really is a cat's life!
Cat's life!!
I have to go and wash dishes, and get the kitchen cleaned. That's something that hasn't changed, no matter where I live or how old I am there will always be dishes!
When I was searching about ageing I came across this quote, which about sums it up!
"Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter." – Mark Twain
Last week, we enjoyed lovely weather: temperatures in the mid-teens Celsius, a few evening showers, and soft breezes. Today, we are back to freezing temperatures, rain, and gale-force winds!
I had plans for this weekend. Since everyone is at home, I thought we could spend a couple of hours in the garden this morning and tomorrow morning, but when I saw the weather, that plan flew out the window.
Rainy day
poor blossoms
So I changed my plans and went shopping, which was a big mistake! Everything is so expensive! The supermarket was busy as it was a sales day but the sales prices weren't that cheap! The best bargain was the eggs, about half the price I usually pay.
I planned to go to two or three different places but couldn't deal with standing there trying to decide if I should buy something or not. I'm not talking about luxury items or expensive import foods but daily food that I can't afford!
Came home and got lunch, which turned out better than I thought it would.
I made 3 colors donburi, this is an obento recipe but it works well as a quick lunch.
3 color donburi
The meat is ground (minced) chicken flavored with soy sauce, sake, mirin and sugar. I added a bit of grated ginger to make it more warming. Scrambled eggs, some recipes use sugar to make the eggs sweet but I add a couple of drops of soy sauce and takana, pickles made from Japanese mustard greens. I've seen green peas used for the green part of the dish. This is served over rice! Quick to make, tasty, and very filling.
David bought a few more plants and started them in containers. But we really need to clear a space as soon as possible. I can do some of the cutting down of the bushes and trees if they are small enough but I need muscle power to get the roots up and to turn over the soil. I'm determined to have a good vegetable garden!
I'm making some nice soup for dinner. One good thing about the cold is that I can make nice, warming meals!
I don't go to the hairdressers very often, it's an expense that I can't really afford but I was starting to look like a wild woman. It was over a year ago that I went last time!
It looks better but feels strange. My hair had grown very long, now it's short and off my neck, I keep thinking something is missing! Also, my neck is cold!
better hair, terrible face
I'm hopeless at taking selfies, I never know where to look. Also my face is puffy from lack of sleep and allergies. But my hair is a lot better!
And I got a discount! I've been going to this hairdresser for years, maybe since Mikey was a baby! I tried a few other places but always came back to this place. I like the way they do my hair.
Mikey took me, then sat and waited while the hairdresser was working on me. Like most hairdressers she is very chatty. She was talking to us for a long time. Many stories of how her business has changed over the years. She was saying that when she and her sister first opened they were busy in January, March, and April. They used to do make-up as well as hairdressing. January was busy for The Coming Of Age Day Ceremony. Kids who have turned twenty are considered adults, there's a ceremony in January that celebrates that! A lot of girls would rent a kimono and have their hair and make-up done professionally. This time of year there is for graduating and April is the start of a new school year with entrance ceremonies. She said that over the last 10 years, those appointments have gone down. A lot of rental kimono places do the girl's hair as part of the package. Also, she saw a decline in doing make-up and hair for wedding parties, most people use an all-inclusive package from a wedding hall.
One thing that has amazed me about this lady is her youthful attitude. She's 76 years old but still opens her shop 3 or 4 days a week, depending on her appointments. She has a lovely style, casual but very smart looking, she wears colors, which is unusual for older ladies in Japan. My mother-in-law told me that after 60 you shouldn't wear bright colors! Also, this lady is still learning. On the table was a high school math book. Mikey asked about this, and she said that she was trying to see how much she could remember and how much had changed. She went on to tell us that she's excited to start piano lessons next month! She wanted to have piano lessons before but didn't have the time or money so she's taking the chance now.
I was blown away by her attitude! I'm 62 and feel that it's too late to start anything new and that my time for learning has passed. That I should stop working and just hang around the house.
Her stories and her desire to learn new things have given me a lot to think about.
So I'm thinking about all the things that I wished I had done when I was younger. Maybe it isn't too late to learn a new skill, to improve on my teaching and get new students. To do more every day, to live life to the fullest!
I have to work on my health, that has to be the starting point, get healthier to do all these things. I'm a bit worried about how tired I get commuting to the other city a couple of times a week. So I need to figure out how to deal with that, to have the energy to commute and teach. Step by step.
It's time to stop saving things for later and start doing them! I have a habit of finding interesting books, web pages or free on line courses to study but instead of studying I just save them for later. Well, now is later. Let's start!
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