June

 If you have read any of my posts from the past few years you will know that June is full of many emotionally triggering days.

My husband's birthday is next week. A very bittersweet day for me. I want to celebrate his birth but at the same time, I still miss him.  It's hard to imagine what he would be like now.

The end of the month, my Mom passed away. She would be 84 now, 20 long years since she passed. 

Also, June is when I had my cancer and mastectomy.  Six years ago.  I still have to see the doctor for another 4 years!

And the month that our lovely dog Lucky passed away.

It's also halfway through the year.  I'm wondering if I have fulfilled or at least made a start on any of the goals I set for this year.  What can I change or do to make the rest of this year fruitful?

Then there is the weather.  The end of June and the beginning of July is the rainy season.  The past few years the rainy season has become a time of disasters.  What used to be gentle rain is now torrential rain that doesn't help to water the ground but rather washes away the good topsoil.  There are floods almost every year and landslides.  The house we are moving to is at the base of a mountain that has had a few landslides over the past 15 years or so.  So far none have been close to the house but it is a worry.  After the rainy season is my least favorite time of year.....summer!!

This year I have decided to look for good things in this month!  I've asked some of my students to tell me what is good about June!

Today has started off good.  David's sickness was caused by him having toothache!  It's not good that he has toothache but at least it's something that is treatable. Apparently his tooth suddenly started to hurt while he was working, and being very tired made him throw up.  He found a dentist nearby and made an appointment.  He didn't really note the name or address of the dentist, just the general area.  He said that when he was driving he noticed that there are many dentists with similar names. He went into 5 different ones before he found the one that he had made the appointment at!  I think he is having a root canal, so a few more appointments, but he is okay now.

Selfie on my phone

If I leave my phone lying around David takes selfies and sends them to Hannah!

The other good thing is that Mikey has a paid magic show today.  He has another one later in the month.  I hope that he can get a few more and he can start to make some money from this!

I really hope to find good things to write about. I need to be more positive. I can't change what has happened but I can make changes now for a better future!

May

 May started terribly, got a bit better but ended on a low note!

The first 10 days or so of May were awful for me.  I had shingles and thought I was dying.  The pain was so intense.  The worst part was that I couldn't lie down.  Standing eased the pain, sitting was tolerable but lying down was the worst. I honestly wondered if I could sleep standing up.  Time and heavy painkillers got me through that. By the time I had recovered the holiday that I had at the beginning of May was finished. That upset me as I had plans.  We try to go to the other house two or three times a week but because we have classes in the afternoon and evening we can only do a few hours. I had planned to spend at least two full days there. Also, I wanted to sort some stuff here, start throwing out things we no longer need, and pack up other things.  For most of the holiday, I had planned on doing nothing, just relaxing, reading, watching TV, and, at most preparing some lessons.  When I first got sick I thought I could at least read, but the pain was so bad that I couldn't concentrate. I watched a lot of stuff on YouTube but again found it hard to concentrate.

I think I was lucky that the shingles I had was rather mild. I don't think I could have dealt with a stronger case.  I've recovered okay but still feel very tired.  I guess that will take time to feel 100%.  I stopped exercising and haven't really gotten into it again. I do a bit of stretching at night but haven't started doing the videos I was using before.  That's my next goal.

The middle of the month saw me playing catch up. One thing I had planned to do was to wash all the heavy blankets and get them put away.  The weather didn't help with that!  It has rained a lot! I've managed to get most done but still a few more to go!  

At least at the other house I could get one room completely cleaned out and the large furniture in the other room moved out.  I hope in June to get things cleaned and then start thinking about what we can afford in the way of reforming.  The one thing we must do is get the toilet situation sorted out.  Other things we can do as we have money.   

The past few days have been hard for Hannah.  Last November she did her one-month teacher training. The feedback she got from the teachers there was very positive.  They pointed out where she could improve, her voice isn't very strong, so she needs to work on that.  But over all the teachers were impressed with the level of professionalism she showed.  When she got her grades she got a 'C'.  She was rather puzzled by this. Her friend who was at the same school was late one time, didn't hand in her report on time and had other problems but she got a 'B'.  Hannah also got a 'C' on her lessons that she did at university, again no explanation as to why they are marking her so low.  The feedback from the students and teachers was again positive.  She spoke briefly to the teacher yesterday, who said the low mark was to encourage her.  I told her to go again.  She is confused, she doesn't understand where she went wrong and what she needs to do to improve.  The teacher said that during her training she didn't communicate with the students but the homeroom teacher praised her and said that Hannah helped a lot to keep the class together.  The homeroom teacher wanted Hannah to stay.  Also, Hannah received a card from the students saying that they really enjoyed having her in the class. If she hadn't communicated with the students they would not have written such positive messages for her.

At the same time, Hannah is having pain in her right hand. She's left-handed so we couldn't figure out why she was having pain in her right hand.  She thinks it might be because of using her phone too much. She has to go to the doctor if it doesn't resolve itself.

Then this morning David came home early from work. He's been sick, throwing up.  

What a way to end the month.  And we all know how hard June is for me!!

Mikey and Sam

Mikey fell asleep on the sofa.  I like that they have the same pose!!

Finally

 Big Drum Roll

I got one room cleaned out at the other house.  I can see some progress!

Still a lot to do.  Still a lot of problems but having a room done is a big achievement. I never thought I would get this far.

First room

This room is the larger bedroom, the one I'll be using.  I want to get a small sofa bed for Hannah to use when she comes to visit. I can finally start to see what I can do in the house, see myself living there, and plan what to do with the rooms.

View from the room

The land next to us is empty at the moment but there is a possibility that houses will be built there.

We are still having problems with the water not being turned on.  I need to find the water meter because the main water switch will be there as well. But I have no idea where it is. I looked around for about half an hour but couldn't see it. I have the basic house plans but no schematics for water or electricity.  

And the bees are back.  Not that many but the area will need to be spayed again.

This morning was good.  Didn't do as much as I would have liked but got something done.

I guess just keep on doing bit by bit.

 

Money

 Again we are struggling. Even with the kids working, Mikey 3 jobs, Hannah two, David night shift, 12 midnight to 9am and Christopher at the local supermarket and whatever freelance writing he can pick up we still are struggling.  

There is never anything left at the end of the month. We can't buy anything, my shoes are falling to pieces, I got my hair cut but couldn't afford a color.  We all need new clothes for the summer but have no idea how to afford them.  I feel guilty because I spent a fortune at the doctors this month because of shingles.  The only luxury we have are the cats.  There is nothing saved for the other house.  I know once we move there I'll be saving the rent but half of that will be spent on renting the community center to teach and gas to go back and forth.  The rest will go to pay off loans. 

We haven't had any new students these past few months, no calls nothing. Part of that is I feel everyone is struggling.

I don't understand economics.  I read about what is happening but I don't understand.  But I see what is happening around me.

The minimum wage where we live is 692 yen, that's about 3.45 pounds.  To put it in context a litre of milk is between 100 yen and 200 yen, 10 eggs cost 170 yen, bread is 150 yen for 6 slices.  Chicken breast is 70 yen for 100 grams, and pork is about the same.  I shopped on Monday, bought some meat, vegetables, fruit, and milk, three bags of groceries cost just over 9000 yen,  44.90 pounds.  That was just enough for two days!!

Japan imports 94% of its raw materials for energy and 62% of its food.  With the yen getting weaker that means prices will go up. Plus there is a 10% tax on everything!  

The government keeps on about the aging population, which is a real problem.  The pension is too small to live on, so many old people keep working, taking the place of young people.  Even though my mother-in-law paid into the system from 17 years old she only got 50,000 yen a month (about 250 pounds).  Until she was hospitalized when she was about 80 years old she had to work.  The welfare officer told me that my mother-in-law had diabetes because her diet was so poor.  The problem was she could only afford carb-heavy foods. Meat, fish, fruits and vegetables were very few and far between.  This is the plight of many elderly people, no real pension, no savings, and no real income. 

Welfare as it is understood in the UK doesn't exist here. Your family is expected to help you out.  A few months ago I was struggling to pay our national insurance so I went to the city hall to see if something could be done.  The first question I was asked was if the kids could help. I explained that they were helping but we had a lot of new things to pay for because of moving. I was then asked if our relatives could help out, I explained that we have no relatives here.  Only after that did the officer make inquiries to see what help I could get.  

I really don't see what my future will be. I have to put a lot of money into the house, no choice. I would love to have money to travel but that is becoming more and more a dream!  

I got so desperate that I set up a GoFundMe account but the site only has PayPal or Bitcoin as its payment options.  I chose PayPal, but the site says they have problems with it in Japan!  They suggested that I use Bitcoin!! I don't know anybody who has Bitcoin and I have no idea how to use it!  

Fluffy on a tray

Just a daft picture to catch your attention!

Made It Through .....

 My busy week!

Actually, I didn't go to the other house Friday. I realized that even if I went I wouldn't be able to do anything.  I rested and did a few jobs here instead.

I'm trying to wash all the heavy blankets and futons, and put them in boxes.  The bigger bedroom in the other house has a big closet so once that is cleaned out the blankets can go there.  It's not a big thing but it's something that I can feel I've done and finished. 

One problem I have is that I feel nothing is finished.  I know almost finished but it's so frustrating.  Just getting one room cleaned properly, and start putting stuff there will feel good!  Does that make sense?

The weather is really warming up!  I'm not happy about that as I've had to use the air conditioner a few times.  I usually don't need it until the end of June when the rainy season starts, then I have it on dry mode to help with the humidity.  April and May are months I can usually save money on bills as we don't need gas heating or air conditioning.  This year we had a few very cold mornings, so the gas heater was on and now the afternoons are hot!  I have to start putting money aside to help with the bills. One year I was putting about 1000 yen aside every time we used the air conditioning, and by the end of the month, I had saved half of the electric bill.

The past couple of evenings the moon rise has been very beautiful. I tried to get photos but the phone camera isn't very good and the light pollution is very strong. Living at the other house there is very little light pollution so moon and star gazing is nice.

Moon rise

Another Problem

 This time it's the car.

When we drove to the other house we noticed an awful squeaking noise.  Turns out to be the fan belt. Mikey called the local garage that we use but they could not get the car in until Saturday.  I was rather worried as Mikey had a lot of places to go to between Wednesday and Saturday.  Mikey checked online and found a spray that would help temporarily.

This morning Mikey took the car in. He had to park and sign a contract.  He was asked to pull the car up to the bay but it wouldn't start, the battery was dead.  I guess it was the best place for it to die.  The garage was very good and got everything done in about an hour!

It's sorted but I think the car won't last that much longer.  We've had it for a few years and we do drive a lot.  On the days that Mikey has cotton candy work, he can drive up to 4 hours round trip!  We need another car; we need two cars but of course no money.  Always the same!

The cats are also causing problems, they are shedding.  We brush them a lot but there is still cat hair everywhere.  Every morning when Hannah is leaving she runs away from the cats as she doesn't want hair on her clothes.  Especially Steve when she is wearing black trousers!!

Steve with his blue eyes

The heat has started as well and I really don't know how much I can do.  The other house is 90%  finished.  I'm hoping to start the actual cleaning.  Outside will have to wait, if we can go early enough then we can start cutting the trees and pulling weeds, but after about 9am it's already too hot.

So much to do, so little time, energy and money!!!

Half Way Through....

 ...the busy week.

And I'm done for!

Went back to the doctor yesterday, my shingles have gone but left me feeling exhausted all the time.

Walked back home, it's just twenty minutes, downhill, so not that bad but yesterday it killed me!  The weather was warm yesterday and my body isn't adjusting to the change. 

Today was back to the other house.  Couldn't do that much there either but did get the last furniture out of the one room.  I wanted to start cleaning but the water wasn't turned on!  

The last room was cleaned out

The bits on the floor are just trash that must be put together.

I wasn't feeling so good, again the heat and humidity today was rather high.  After an hour or so I gave up. 

On the way home we stopped by a supermarket.  Unfortunately my blood sugar dropped and I got very dizzy, at one point I thought I was going to pass out.  This is the first time in ages that has happened.  I'll have to take something to snack on next time, just some fruit or something!

I have to think about meals for the summer.  When it's cool it's so easy to cook but as the weather warms up it gets harder and harder.  I can live on salads, but the kids want "real food".  

Tomorrow is my busy teaching day.  Not difficult lessons but a few back-to-back.  Going to make some lesson plans.  I wanted to do that during my holiday but couldn't!!!

Busy Week Ahead

 The rest of this week is going to be busy for me.

Tomorrow I have a doctor's appointment, the last one I hope. Just to check that my shingles have gone completely.  I feel a lot better, just this constant fatigue, that is driving me crazy!

Wednesday and Friday I hope to go to the other house.  The water should be on, maybe the power as well.  I can start cleaning, the kids can get the last few things out.  I'm looking forward to getting the place cleaned up, maybe think about painting some of the walls.  I'm looking for ideas on how to brighten the place up without spending a lot of money.  Even though the kitchen is not that well designed, most kitchens in Japan are badly designed, I can work with it. The biggest problem is the massive sink and no counter space.  When we moved out, I left an island counter, but my mother-in-law hacked at it and ruined it.  I have a couple of ideas on how to either make it look nice or replace it with some tables that I have. Something to think about.

Thursday is a busy day teaching.

Saturday I don't have anything planned but I will try to clean out some more cupboards here.

Yesterday I decided to clear out the cupboards in the bathroom.  I couldn't remember what was inside. They are too high for me to use, to see inside I had to climb on a chair!

I found a few things that we can still use, wet tissues, shampoo, conditioner, and a toilet brush, still in its packing!

The one find that shocked me was two bottles of mouthwash.

mouthwash

These were one of the last things Hisao bought just before he died!

 A week before he died we went to Costco to do the last Christmas shopping.  It was the first time I had Christmas organized before Christmas Eve!

I didn't know whether to laugh or cry when I found those bottles. I ended up doing both!

I'm amazed at what memories small things like this bring flooding back!

I really hope to get a lot done this week. It is already hot.  31C today, which is unusual for May.  The humidity is low so I can cope!  The rainy season is just around the corner, that is going to be hard. 

Fatigue

 I get tired very easily!

Before I had shingles I would go to the other house, work for up to 4 hours, and sometimes shop on the way home, then feel awful the next day.

Since recovering from shingles I feel like that all day, every day!  I wash dishes then feel like I've run a marathon!!  I sleep as much as possible but am still tired.  I don't feel refreshed at all.

Yesterday was awful, physically tired but also the most awful brain fog.  I tried to watch TV but couldn't follow the plot. Decided to read but kept reading the same sentence!  I thought I was going crazy!

Checked on the internet, apparently, this kind of fatigue is normal after having a virus!  I know the last few times I had flu and when I had covid it took up to a month to feel 100%. The problem is that I can't take a month to recover, I have to try and get the other house cleaned, organize things here, and of course the daily things that need to be done!  I'm getting the kids to do as much as possible but they are also tired. I'm trying not to panic but I see time passing so fast and the move is looming on the horizon! I keep telling myself we will get there!  I don't know how but we will!!

Why?

Mikey with ice cream on his head! He said he had his hands full!!!!

It's Started!!!!

 The temperature has started to rise. The average temperature here is about 24 during the day and a low of 15C at night.  Toady should get up to 31C, next week is going to be about the same.  I'm not ready for that!! No choice, I know that, but the longer it stays cool the more I can get done at the other house.  We are getting the power on this week but the air conditioners are old and never cleaned!!  I need to buy new ones but of course no money!

Went to the other house yesterday.  Didn't do any work because it was rather late when we got there. The hairdresser that I go to is on the way, so I got my haircut!  As much as I love my hairdresser I think I have to find another place.  The lady is 75 years old and still sharp but I can see she is slowing down.  I've been going there for 30 years now, which makes it difficult for me to want to change.

At the other house we had another go at spraying the bees.  Mikey's turn this time. Of course he got stung but just on the clothes.

The bee-killing get up!

On the way home we stopped at a few shops.  Just food shopping. I'm craving fruit but it's so expensive.

As I was coming out of one shop I saw a kid taking photos, looking up I saw a bird's nest with the mama bird and chicks.

You can just see the chicks

These look like handmade nests, not natural, maybe to encourage the birds to nest there!

I'm really trying to be positive, to change my energy and focus on the good not the myriad of problems I have.  I'm stressed but I know that isn't helping me at all.  Yesterday evening I was waiting for my students to come. I could feel the tension in me build up, I love these girls but they are so energetic and I wasn't sure if I could deal with it last night.  I sat in my living room, thinking about what to teach, looking for something to help me calm down a bit when I noticed Steve, our white cat.  The way the light caught his eyes made them look very blue, I took photos but they aren't that good! 

blue eyes

I sat talking to Steve, just mesmerized by his eye color.  Just those few minutes helped me to feel calmer and have a bit of energy to teach.  My lesson turned out a lot better than I thought it would.  These girls always make me laugh!!

B-Day

 The day to get rid of the bees!

Didn't go to plan.  The first idea was to tape some mesh over the vents.  Two problems, one, how to get the mesh to stick.  The material that the mesh is made out of doesn't stick very well to tape.  The second problem was how to get close enough to the vents with bees going in and out.

I decided that instead of trying to cover the vent to cover myself.  I thought it would be best if I did the spraying.  Christopher has an allergy to bees.  If I got stung then David could drive me to a hospital.  But David decided that he would do the spraying!

I was shocked to see that the bees were using two vents to go in and out, one on the front of the house and one on the side!  I think the hive must have gotten bigger!

I put a very thin gauze scarf over David's head and face, held in place with a cap, he was wearing long sleeves and gloves.  He used up all of the spray we had bought!  I went inside the room over where the hive is, the noise was incredible, it sounded like some kind of motor.  By the time we left, there were almost no bees.  I'm planning on going again on Friday and will give it another good spray!

One thing that cheered me up is the blueberry bushes have fruits on them.  Looking forward to fresh blueberries.  I hope to get enough to make jam, I've only made it once but would love to try again!  Fresh blueberries are very expensive here, actually, most fruits are expensive.  I would love to try and grow some fruits.  I'm wondering if you can buy mature trees!  Something else to look up!

blueberries just starting

Of course, now that the weather is warming up all the creepy crawlies are coming out.

I was trying to clean out the last small room putting things to throw away into bags to take to the city incinerator, when a Godzilla-sized cockroach came out.  I screamed for help, David came with a baseball bat and Christopher with a mallet.  Poor cockroach didn't stand a chance.

Exercise Part 2

 Back in February, a friend challenged me to do 40 days of exercise.  I managed to do that and found that it really helped my body.  The exercises I chose were very gentle chair exercises for seniors. Most of the videos I did were 15 minutes long. After the 40 days finished I kept up with the exercises, doing 3 to 5 days a week. I was surprised at how good I felt.  I have arthritis in my knee and lower back pain.  Standing or walking for more than 15 minutes would leave me in absolute agony. After doing exercises for a month I found I could stand longer and longer.  I remember one day I cleaned the kitchen, cleaned out the pantry, and then cooked lunch, about an hour and a half on my feet and I only started to feel a little twinge in back in the last 10 minutes or so.  I was so excited!  One thing want to do after we are settled in the other house is travel but I felt it would be impossible because of all the walking involved.

Then I got shingles.  Everything stopped.  I'm grateful that I think I got a mild case, some people I have talked to were sick for months.  For me, it's been just over 3 weeks.  I still have a bit of pain, but it's not crippling, I actually don't notice it until I'm very tired!  Also, the rash had faded to a red blotch. But three weeks of being inactive have set me back. I noticed yesterday that my back was hurting a lot after cooking and cleaning.  Today my knee is achy! 

Another lesson learned!  I need exercise. I need to stretch, move my body, and build some muscle.

I don't know when I will start again.  But I have to.  This is part of my journey to being healthy.  

Tomorrow we are going to the other house.  I know after that I won't feel up to doing anything extra.  Thursday I might try an easy chair yoga video.  

At the moment I'm making mental lists of the things that need to be done. I want to get packed up here as soon as possible, start cleaning the house, get utilities turned on, find out about the toilet and the land. Lots to do, but little time and less money!!

Steve being cute

It's a cat's life!! 

Sunday

I loved Sundays growing up.

I remember as a teenager I had a paper round. I would get up between 6 and 7 am, deliver my papers then crawl back into bed. I only had a few papers to deliver on a Sunday morning, less than 10, but the houses and flats were far apart.  One vivid memory I have is trying to deliver the Sunday Times, there were so many supplements and magazines that I had to take it apart and push each part through the letter box one at a time.  After finishing I would go back home and crawl back in bed, especially in the winter.

Mom always made a roast, and most weeks an apple pie, if she wasn't too tired she would bake a Victoria sponge as well.

Sunday afternoons were lazy times, we might have to do a couple of chores. As I got older one job I had was ironing, took hours!  Also, I would listen to the top 40 pop songs.  One Christmas I got a cassette tape recorder for Christmas, I think I copied the top 40 almost every week.

There was just something nice about Sunday.  Nowhere was open, nowhere to go.  It felt good to stay home!

When I came to Japan I was shocked that all shops open on a Sunday.  Spending a day at the shops or shopping malls was normal.  Libraries are open but closed on Monday.  The only places closed are banks, offices, doctors, and dentists.

I really try not to shop on Sunday.  Everywhere is busy.  I prefer to stay home or maybe visit someplace just to go sightseeing.  When the kids were young going to the library was fun.

Yesterday I had to go to the local supermarket to get a few things for lunch. I was going to ask David to stop by on the way home from his night shift but it was pouring down with rain.  David goes to work by bike and I knew he hadn't taken his raincoat.

The supermarket is where Christopher works, so we dropped him off and then waited for the store to open.  

There were people already lined up.  The store had a countdown to opening.  "5 minutes to opening", "3 minutes to opening" and then "The store is open".

When I got in I could see why it was so busy, big sales day.

Bananas were half price, 100 yen off a pack of ramen noodles, and rice was less than 2000 yen for 5 kilos.  There were other things on sale but those are the things that I noticed.  

waiting for the store to open

I'm glad I went as I could get some good bargains but I still prefer my lazy Sundays when I was young!

Gardening

 I really want my posts to be more positive but some things just get to me!

Yesterday we got a letter from the real estate agents saying that the neighbors asked that we cut the trees. First of all, I still can't figure out how the neighbors know which real estate agency we are using. Within walking distance of our house, there are at least 20 real estate agents!  I always feel that our privacy has been invaded!

Also, I know the trees need cutting, I'm not blind, just busy or sick.

The past few months any free time has been taken up going to the other house. The only time we don't go is when it's raining! I'm not going to garden in the rain. At times like this, I wish my Japanese was better because I would go and give them a piece of my mind.  They have never done any repairs that I've asked for. The bathroom sink was leaking, I asked that it be repaired, but had to wait over 5 years, by that time the rot had set in and the floor needed to be replaced as well. Then they charged me. I know going and yelling at them won't change anything but I would feel better.  I guess this is one of the pluses of having your own house.  Nobody can complain, and if they do I can ignore them!

Anyway, this morning Christopher and I went out and made a start!  One tree on the front worries me as the top branches brush against the power lines. I really think these trees are not good for a yard, they grow too big!

Christopher managed to cut down some of the taller branches.  I thought about taking down the tree but because of the position, I think we need a professional.  If it falls one way it could damage the house, the other way it could take down the power lines. If we were staying here I would pay for it to be removed but all the money I have now, after paying bills is going into the other house. 

I cut a few bushes, but not much because my back started to hurt.  I still have shingles, it's not bad but the pain is still there.  I know that I should rest but I'm feeling the pressure of needing to get things done.

Christopher did very well until the new saw came to pieces.  He forgot to lock the blade into the handle.

Oops!

I got some photos of what he took down. It's difficult to see how big.  The storage shed behind gives an idea!

This is just one branch

Can you see Christopher?

I planned to do some more tomorrow, but guess what?  It's going to rain!!!!

Shopping

 I like shopping, most of the time!  At the moment it's a bit stressful as the things I need to buy and the things I would love to buy cost a lot more than the money I have! 

Today I went to a large home center near here.  It's a DIY shop, garden center, pet shop (pet goods not animals), many lovely things for the kitchen, and a furniture store.  Christopher came with me I needed to buy some spray for the bees and some different cleaning agents.  It really helps to be able to read Japanese!

I wandered through the furniture store, just sighing at all the beautiful furniture, thinking how this or that would look in the house but realizing that I don't have the budget now and how to keep things nice with the cats!

Then I got sidetracked by the kitchen department.  I saw things that I might treat myself to once we are settled in.  One thing that caught my eye was these placemats

Nice placemats

I was tempted to buy them but I know that I would probably misplace them before we move.  I did buy some bee-killing spray and some gardening tools.  

Then onto a discount store. Not sure why it's called a discount store as it's not really that cheap!  This store has a supermarket in it.  They usually have good fruit there.  I got some grapes and cut watermelon. The meat is sometimes a bit cheaper than the local supermarket, today the mince was a decent price, so tomorrow's lunch will be hamburgers.

The last place I went was the 100 yen shop.  That is the most dangerous place for me.  Lovely goods at 100 yen. I go around putting things in my basket, thinking "It's only 100 yen", the problem is that those 100 yens add up.  Today I resisted temptation, just 500 yen, again cleaning products.

The last place I stopped into was a recycle shop.  The name of the shop always makes me smile.

recycle shop

I often wonder if the person who came up with that shop name knew what a fly is!!  When I first saw this shop I had the image of old things with flies hovering over them!! But the goods are good quality!

Nice morning shopping.  Just need a lot more money!
.

Ganbatte

 I've just started to read an interesting book called 'Ganbatte, The Japanese Art of Always Moving Forward' by Albert Liebermann.

Ganbatte (Ganbaru) can be translated as do your best, preserve, don't give up, keep going.  It's used to encourage people.  In England when faced with challenges we are told "Good luck". In Japan, ganbatte is used in similar situations, before tests, an athlete meet, or starting something new.  The author points out that good luck leaves things up to fate whereas ganbatte encourages people to do their best.

I've heard this word since I came to Japan.  I remember Hisao encouraging the kids when they started to walk. He would sit on the floor, arms open, saying "Come to daddy, you can do it, ganbatte"  I'm sure that in Japanese homes up and down the country, this scenario is played out!  From kindergarten to university, kids are encouraged by parents, teachers, and friends with the word ganbatte.  There is even a way to use it for oneself, ganbaru.  This morning Hannah went off to university with a heavy backpack.  She sent me a message saying that she had got to the station but was already tired.  My message to her was "Ganbatte", and she replied with "Ganbarimasu"  (has the same meaning as ganbaru).

Japan is a country plagued by natural disasters. I think this attitude of persevering and doing one's best grew out of having to constantly rebuild and start over again. Without this attitude, the Japanese would have given up a long time ago.

I remember when we had that massive earthquake a few years ago, there was a news report, CNN or BBC, I forget which one, that was showing people who had been evacuated to the local school gym.  The footage showed a long line of people, family groups, old ladies in little clusters, chatting away, waiting to get a rice ball and bottle of tea. Nobody was fighting, no hysterics, some were laughing and chatting, others more serious and somber.  Most had probably lost their houses, and others maybe their livelihood as well.  The reporter said that he was amazed at the stoicism of the Japanese people.  I think really comes from internalizing the idea of ganbatte.

So why am I writing this?  Basically, I need to have this attitude.  I need to be able to persevere and do my best as I face moving to the other house.   I can't change this, as much as I would love to.  Luck isn't going to help me.  My internal attitude has to be better than it has been for the past year or so.  Fighting internally against the move, moaning (on here and to my kids) isn't going to change things, it is just adding stress.  I think that the result of the extra stress caused me to get shingles.  Stress impairs the immune system, making one vulnerable to any little thing!  I also need to be a lot more grateful. If we didn't have this house I would have to rehome the cats.  And you can call me out on this when I start moaning again!

And to finish just a cute Fluffy photo.  Mikey was getting ready for work the other evening.  He couldn't find his wallet!!

Fluffy with Mikey's wallet

Looks like she was trying to hide it to stop him from going to work.

It's Back

 The pain!!!  I felt so good yesterday, I walked home from the clinic, shopped on the way, cleaned, and made dinner.  I felt so good, almost no pain until the night when I started to feel a small twinge.  Today it's bad again.  I'm tired and miserable!  I was really hoping that my recovery would be a straight line but I guess not.  Never mind I've learned my lesson, I should still take things easy!

The cats are getting into summer mode. They are shredding everywhere! We brush them daily but still need to constantly sweep and vacuum.  

Having nine cats means nine very different personalities.  Last night somebody forgot to lock the front door.  I was watching TV when Hannah suddenly shouted "Steve's outside".  Went to check but just got to the door when Steve and Fred came back in, head down with a sheepish look.  We counted the cats and found Toast was missing.  We looked round, I decided to look under the car and there he was.  As soon as he saw me he shot out and ran back inside.  He wasn't going to cower.  He spent the rest of the evening on top of the bookshelf, staring outside, with a look that said I want to go out!

Toast staring outside.

I have one lesson this evening, then going to rest!

Wake Up Call

 I still have shingles but it's a lot better. Went to the pain clinic again today but I didn't need the injection in my back, which I'm very happy about.  I got another week's worth of medicine and have to go back next week.

When I went to the pain clinic last week I had to list surgeries and any health problems I have. The list was a lot longer than it should be, plus I didn't list everything.  Surgeries include both of my eyes for cataracts and a mastectomy.  My health problems include arthritis in my knee, gallstones, obesity, and diabetes.  I was rather shocked when I thought about it, I'm only 61, surely I should be healthier than that!

So I realized that I need to commit to losing weight and exercising more.  My goal was 62kgs by 62.  My birthday is in August so I don't think I'll make it, I would need to lose about 8kgs a month which is doable but I believe it's dangerous.  Also losing so much so quickly would just mean rebounding!  But I must get to 60-something kgs before the end of the year.  But I refuse to diet, whenever I decide to not eat certain foods, for example, sugary treats, I crave them more and more. I finally give in, figure I've blown my diet, and eat even more.  So this time I'm going to make sure that I don't have any sugary treats in the house, and buy more fruits.  If I want something with sugar I can bake, which I don't do so much in the summer.

This morning, after the clinic Christopher and I stopped in Mos Burger, Japan's answer to McDonald's, but much nicer (and more expensive)

Mos Burgers

I had iced tea, and we shared the french fries

It was nice to sit and chat for a bit.  We decided to walk back.  According to Google Maps, it's about 17 minutes walk, I think it took me 25 minutes.  Not too bad and I wasn't in pain when I got back.  One reason it took longer was I stopped a few times to take photos.

Lovely flowers

I have no idea what these flowers are but they are very beautiful.  They were growing outside a restaurant.

A little further down the road, I saw a blast from the past.

A public phone

I've seen a few phones but not a phone booth.  I know that Hannah's high school had a phone near the office for students to use, as cell phones were banned.

Frustrated

 Tomorrow is the last day of my 10-day holiday and all my great plans have fallen through.

My plan was to spend 2 full days at the other house.  That would have given me time to get the last few things out and start cleaning.  Then I was going to spend 3 days to start packing up some things here. It's starting to get warm so I was going to wash the extra blankets and put those and the heavy winter coats away.  I did manage to pack up 4 boxes of books to keep and 4 boxes of books to throw out.  Actually, the kids did most of the work, I sat and supervised!!!  Then I was going to spend the rest of the holiday reading and researching how to make a YouTube channel.  I know that sitting reading or watching videos isn't hard but I was in so much pain that it was hard to focus.  

The pain isn't as intense as it was, the pain medication and sleeping pills are helping.  My biggest problem now is exhaustion. I feel like I've had the flu after the fever breaks and you start recovering, that kind of exhaustion.  At least now I can send the light at the end of the tunnel.  

From what I've read online stress can affect the immune system.  My stress level has been at its highest for years.  

My biggest stress is getting money to move, which seems impossible.  I have so many ideas for the house but no money to do anything.  Even hiring a company to move our stuff might be impossible.  Then how to make money once we move there.  We plan to keep teaching here but have very few students and I don't know if I want to start again near where we are moving to.  So many questions, no answers!!

Christopher's drawing of me

The Pain Clinic

The doctor yesterday wrote a letter explaining my symptoms and the pain I was experiencing. The staff made an appointment for the same day. I was hoping I could get some relief. No still in pain, actually it feels worse. The pain was localised now it seems to be spreading. 

I decided to walk. According to Google Maps, it's only 17 minutes from the house, took me just over 20 minutes.  Not too bad considering it was all uphill.

When I got there the first thing was to check height, weight, and blood pressure.  My blood pressure was down, my weight up and I've lost another 3cm in height!  After filling in the paper worker it was a case of waiting.  Not too long, maybe 30 minutes. I was surprised that the walk had eased the pain but sitting started it up again.  Talked to the doctor, she said that this will get worse before it gets better, not what I wanted to hear.  She prescribed an extra painkiller for the night and some Chinese herbal medicine,  I then had an X-ray and blood test.  She wants to give me an injection of nerve blockers but wanted to make sure that my spine was okay and that my blood wasn't too thin.  I have to go next Tuesday morning, I don't want this but I need it.  I start teaching on Wednesday and need to be a bit better by then.

The main road up to the clinic

It's hard to see but the area is surrounded by mountains.  This is normal in Japan,  mountains everywhere.

Christopher bought some lovely meat pies. So dinner was meat pies, baked potatoes, and meat pies.

meat pies

Nice dinner

And of course, cake for Hannah's birthday.

Hannah's cakes

Hannah's Birthday

 My little preemie is now 22. 

Those years have flown by.

We had yaki-niku and sashimi for lunch.  Yaki means to grill, and niku is meat.

Meat being cooked on the grill, sashimi on the plate

Nice lunch.

Just a few photos.

entering High School

16th birthday

Going to driving school

Dressed up to go to the city

Playing with an app.

I'm not doing so well.  The pain from shingles is intense, the painkiller isn't helping.  Another night of no sleep, plus it went very cold, which made me tense up, making the pain worse.  I went back to the doctor, he has given me some sleeping tablets and made an appointment at a pain clinic.  So I have to go again to a different doctor.  I know that until the virus is finished there isn't much that can be done but the pain is intense.  I broke a rib a few years ago, this feels the same.

I just want to relax, get ready for teaching and have some fun. I bought a card for Hulu, I use to have a subscription but didn't watch that often so I decided to cancel it.  But one can buy a months subscription using cards.  It's good for me, I can watch something, try to relax and heal.  I want to sleep as I know that is the best but lying down is the most painful.

Better go and get ready, my appointment is this afternoon.  I'll update later!