Mom

Mom would have been 87 yesterday!

It's hard to believe, but Mom was 64 when she passed away- the age I am now! 

It feels too young to die! I know that people die at any age, from just being born to people in their 100s. 

Still, 64 is young; at least I feel it's young.

I remember talking to Hannah about Bonnie Tyler dying this past summer. She was 75; I remarked to Hannah that was young. Hannah said it wasn't that young. I guess it's closer to my age; therefore, it feels young.

Thinking about Mom, when I was a kid I realised that she never took time for herself. She was always doing something. She always worked, even part-time; she cleaned the house constantly and cooked almost every day. Sunday was baking day; almost every week, growing up we had some kind of cake on Sunday. She never missed a birthday, and Christmas cards were always sent out in plenty of time. 

In her 50s, she did start to do things she enjoyed, visiting places, going to the theatre. 

I always saw my Mom as the perfect Mom and often wondered how she did it all. She was always there to comfort and fix things. I used to think she had some kind of magic. 

I wonder what she would have been like if she had lived. Something I'll never know.

Found a few photos of Mom.

One of the first photos of Mom; she said she was in her teens here.

The last photo I have of Mom, just a couple of weeks before she passed away.

Happier times, on the beach with baby Mikey.

One thing I learnt from Mom is that life is for living, not just sitting and worrying. Mom worried a lot, but she also kept on going!

On one trip back to the UK, Mom and I were shopping at a market. There was a butcher's shop; the butcher was trying to sell some beef. This was when mad cow disease was discovered in the UK; the price of beef dropped, and it was difficult to sell as people were worried about getting sick.

The butcher kept dropping the price of this piece of beef, but no one was interested. When it got ridiculously low, Mom shouted out that she would buy it. The lady next to her said, "You're stupid buying that; you could die if you eat beef"

My Mom's reply was priceless: "That's true, I could die if I eat beef but I could walk out of here and get hit by a bus, I would rather enjoy a nice roast dinner than worry about a diesease that won't show up for years. If you want safety, stay in bed!" There was a round of applause from the customers and the butcher!

Life is indeed dangerous and scary. But wasting away in bed because you are too scared is just sad. On the days when my anxiety overwhelms me and I feel that I can't go on, I remember the beef incident and ask myself what Mom would do.