Ganbatte

 I've just started to read an interesting book called 'Ganbatte, The Japanese Art of Always Moving Forward' by Albert Liebermann.

Ganbatte (Ganbaru) can be translated as do your best, preserve, don't give up, keep going.  It's used to encourage people.  In England when faced with challenges we are told "Good luck". In Japan, ganbatte is used in similar situations, before tests, an athlete meet, or starting something new.  The author points out that good luck leaves things up to fate whereas ganbatte encourages people to do their best.

I've heard this word since I came to Japan.  I remember Hisao encouraging the kids when they started to walk. He would sit on the floor, arms open, saying "Come to daddy, you can do it, ganbatte"  I'm sure that in Japanese homes up and down the country, this scenario is played out!  From kindergarten to university, kids are encouraged by parents, teachers, and friends with the word ganbatte.  There is even a way to use it for oneself, ganbaru.  This morning Hannah went off to university with a heavy backpack.  She sent me a message saying that she had got to the station but was already tired.  My message to her was "Ganbatte", and she replied with "Ganbarimasu"  (has the same meaning as ganbaru).

Japan is a country plagued by natural disasters. I think this attitude of persevering and doing one's best grew out of having to constantly rebuild and start over again. Without this attitude, the Japanese would have given up a long time ago.

I remember when we had that massive earthquake a few years ago, there was a news report, CNN or BBC, I forget which one, that was showing people who had been evacuated to the local school gym.  The footage showed a long line of people, family groups, old ladies in little clusters, chatting away, waiting to get a rice ball and bottle of tea. Nobody was fighting, no hysterics, some were laughing and chatting, others more serious and somber.  Most had probably lost their houses, and others maybe their livelihood as well.  The reporter said that he was amazed at the stoicism of the Japanese people.  I think really comes from internalizing the idea of ganbatte.

So why am I writing this?  Basically, I need to have this attitude.  I need to be able to persevere and do my best as I face moving to the other house.   I can't change this, as much as I would love to.  Luck isn't going to help me.  My internal attitude has to be better than it has been for the past year or so.  Fighting internally against the move, moaning (on here and to my kids) isn't going to change things, it is just adding stress.  I think that the result of the extra stress caused me to get shingles.  Stress impairs the immune system, making one vulnerable to any little thing!  I also need to be a lot more grateful. If we didn't have this house I would have to rehome the cats.  And you can call me out on this when I start moaning again!

And to finish just a cute Fluffy photo.  Mikey was getting ready for work the other evening.  He couldn't find his wallet!!

Fluffy with Mikey's wallet

Looks like she was trying to hide it to stop him from going to work.

It's Back

 The pain!!!  I felt so good yesterday, I walked home from the clinic, shopped on the way, cleaned, and made dinner.  I felt so good, almost no pain until the night when I started to feel a small twinge.  Today it's bad again.  I'm tired and miserable!  I was really hoping that my recovery would be a straight line but I guess not.  Never mind I've learned my lesson, I should still take things easy!

The cats are getting into summer mode. They are shredding everywhere! We brush them daily but still need to constantly sweep and vacuum.  

Having nine cats means nine very different personalities.  Last night somebody forgot to lock the front door.  I was watching TV when Hannah suddenly shouted "Steve's outside".  Went to check but just got to the door when Steve and Fred came back in, head down with a sheepish look.  We counted the cats and found Toast was missing.  We looked round, I decided to look under the car and there he was.  As soon as he saw me he shot out and ran back inside.  He wasn't going to cower.  He spent the rest of the evening on top of the bookshelf, staring outside, with a look that said I want to go out!

Toast staring outside.

I have one lesson this evening, then going to rest!

Wake Up Call

 I still have shingles but it's a lot better. Went to the pain clinic again today but I didn't need the injection in my back, which I'm very happy about.  I got another week's worth of medicine and have to go back next week.

When I went to the pain clinic last week I had to list surgeries and any health problems I have. The list was a lot longer than it should be, plus I didn't list everything.  Surgeries include both of my eyes for cataracts and a mastectomy.  My health problems include arthritis in my knee, gallstones, obesity, and diabetes.  I was rather shocked when I thought about it, I'm only 61, surely I should be healthier than that!

So I realized that I need to commit to losing weight and exercising more.  My goal was 62kgs by 62.  My birthday is in August so I don't think I'll make it, I would need to lose about 8kgs a month which is doable but I believe it's dangerous.  Also losing so much so quickly would just mean rebounding!  But I must get to 60-something kgs before the end of the year.  But I refuse to diet, whenever I decide to not eat certain foods, for example, sugary treats, I crave them more and more. I finally give in, figure I've blown my diet, and eat even more.  So this time I'm going to make sure that I don't have any sugary treats in the house, and buy more fruits.  If I want something with sugar I can bake, which I don't do so much in the summer.

This morning, after the clinic Christopher and I stopped in Mos Burger, Japan's answer to McDonald's, but much nicer (and more expensive)

Mos Burgers

I had iced tea, and we shared the french fries

It was nice to sit and chat for a bit.  We decided to walk back.  According to Google Maps, it's about 17 minutes walk, I think it took me 25 minutes.  Not too bad and I wasn't in pain when I got back.  One reason it took longer was I stopped a few times to take photos.

Lovely flowers

I have no idea what these flowers are but they are very beautiful.  They were growing outside a restaurant.

A little further down the road, I saw a blast from the past.

A public phone

I've seen a few phones but not a phone booth.  I know that Hannah's high school had a phone near the office for students to use, as cell phones were banned.

Frustrated

 Tomorrow is the last day of my 10-day holiday and all my great plans have fallen through.

My plan was to spend 2 full days at the other house.  That would have given me time to get the last few things out and start cleaning.  Then I was going to spend 3 days to start packing up some things here. It's starting to get warm so I was going to wash the extra blankets and put those and the heavy winter coats away.  I did manage to pack up 4 boxes of books to keep and 4 boxes of books to throw out.  Actually, the kids did most of the work, I sat and supervised!!!  Then I was going to spend the rest of the holiday reading and researching how to make a YouTube channel.  I know that sitting reading or watching videos isn't hard but I was in so much pain that it was hard to focus.  

The pain isn't as intense as it was, the pain medication and sleeping pills are helping.  My biggest problem now is exhaustion. I feel like I've had the flu after the fever breaks and you start recovering, that kind of exhaustion.  At least now I can send the light at the end of the tunnel.  

From what I've read online stress can affect the immune system.  My stress level has been at its highest for years.  

My biggest stress is getting money to move, which seems impossible.  I have so many ideas for the house but no money to do anything.  Even hiring a company to move our stuff might be impossible.  Then how to make money once we move there.  We plan to keep teaching here but have very few students and I don't know if I want to start again near where we are moving to.  So many questions, no answers!!

Christopher's drawing of me

The Pain Clinic

The doctor yesterday wrote a letter explaining my symptoms and the pain I was experiencing. The staff made an appointment for the same day. I was hoping I could get some relief. No still in pain, actually it feels worse. The pain was localised now it seems to be spreading. 

I decided to walk. According to Google Maps, it's only 17 minutes from the house, took me just over 20 minutes.  Not too bad considering it was all uphill.

When I got there the first thing was to check height, weight, and blood pressure.  My blood pressure was down, my weight up and I've lost another 3cm in height!  After filling in the paper worker it was a case of waiting.  Not too long, maybe 30 minutes. I was surprised that the walk had eased the pain but sitting started it up again.  Talked to the doctor, she said that this will get worse before it gets better, not what I wanted to hear.  She prescribed an extra painkiller for the night and some Chinese herbal medicine,  I then had an X-ray and blood test.  She wants to give me an injection of nerve blockers but wanted to make sure that my spine was okay and that my blood wasn't too thin.  I have to go next Tuesday morning, I don't want this but I need it.  I start teaching on Wednesday and need to be a bit better by then.

The main road up to the clinic

It's hard to see but the area is surrounded by mountains.  This is normal in Japan,  mountains everywhere.

Christopher bought some lovely meat pies. So dinner was meat pies, baked potatoes, and meat pies.

meat pies

Nice dinner

And of course, cake for Hannah's birthday.

Hannah's cakes

Hannah's Birthday

 My little preemie is now 22. 

Those years have flown by.

We had yaki-niku and sashimi for lunch.  Yaki means to grill, and niku is meat.

Meat being cooked on the grill, sashimi on the plate

Nice lunch.

Just a few photos.

entering High School

16th birthday

Going to driving school

Dressed up to go to the city

Playing with an app.

I'm not doing so well.  The pain from shingles is intense, the painkiller isn't helping.  Another night of no sleep, plus it went very cold, which made me tense up, making the pain worse.  I went back to the doctor, he has given me some sleeping tablets and made an appointment at a pain clinic.  So I have to go again to a different doctor.  I know that until the virus is finished there isn't much that can be done but the pain is intense.  I broke a rib a few years ago, this feels the same.

I just want to relax, get ready for teaching and have some fun. I bought a card for Hulu, I use to have a subscription but didn't watch that often so I decided to cancel it.  But one can buy a months subscription using cards.  It's good for me, I can watch something, try to relax and heal.  I want to sleep as I know that is the best but lying down is the most painful.

Better go and get ready, my appointment is this afternoon.  I'll update later!

Oh......Insert Favorite Swear Word

 Another night of no sleep.  The painkiller from the emergency doctor only worked one time.  Yesterday (Monday, April 29th) was a national holiday, and the hospital that I go to for bone/muscle problems was closed.  Also, Mikey had the car.

I really tried to persevere.  Mikey would have time to take me to the hospital in the afternoon.   But this morning I was feeling terrible, so David called the hospital, to make sure it was open and a taxi. This time Christopher came with me.  The hospital is an orthopedic and internal medicine hospital.  It also has a large rehabilitation room.  Because this is the week with many national holidays the hospital was very busy.

We got there at 9:30, had an x-ray then waited until 11 o'clock to see the doctor.  At one point an ambulance was called to pick up an elderly lady.  Looks like she was bought in from an old people's home, she wasn't doing very well at all!!!

Finally got to see the doctor.  He took one look at the side where the pain is and said something in Japanese that I had never heard before.  Turns out that my pulled muscle is shingles.  I had noticed a rash in the morning but thought it was an allergic reaction to a rub I had used for the pain!!

I had to wait a bit longer to see the other doctor.  He confirmed the diagnosis and prescribed antiviral medicine, a cream, and strong painkiller!!  

Yet another holiday ruined!!  Never mind, if the painkiller works at least I can read and watch TV.

One thing I'm very grateful for is the Japanese medical system.  In some ways it's difficult to navigate, there are no GPs so you have to figure out where to go.  Because I've lived here for 15 years I have an idea of where to go. Also one of my early students here was a public nurse, she introduced different hospitals to me.  The fact that even during one of the busiest times I can walk into a hospital and know that I will be seen is good.  The wait is a few hours but better than a few months in the UK.  Also, I pay into the national health system.  Last year I was paying about 40 pounds a month for Christopher, Hannah, and myself.  David's is paid through his work and Mikey pays his own.  Then at the doctors, dentist, and pharmacy, you pay just 30% of the cost.  It's not a perfect system but one of the best I've seen.

I'm trying not to panic about the other house I was planning on going for a few days during this holiday but looks like I can't do that.  I'll try to sort things out here more!!

Hannah had work at the nursery this morning.  She's also a bit under the weather, allergies, and a low-grade fever.  She was racing about to get ready but didn't notice that she had put on odd socks until she got to work.  She told the staff that it was a new fashion!

Odd socks!