Of Hospitals and Vets

 First a disclaimer.  This is my experience and opinion.  

A while back I was speaking to one of my students about the hospital in this area.  She asked me about the hospital where we took my husband when he died.  I told her I would never use that hospital again.  When David collapsed a few years back the paramedics suggested that hospital and I said no, there are other hospitals that are the same distance from our house that I would prefer.

The student asked why I wouldn't use that hospital.  I explained that when we took my husband there we were treated very badly.  He died in the middle of the night.  I had no idea what to do but I knew that I would need a death certificate signed by a doctor.  So we called an ambulance that took us to that hospital, Mikey came with me, the other kids came by taxi later. I had no idea what would happen and I wanted them to have a chance to say goodbye.  By the time the doctor had finished, it was early morning, maybe 5am.  My husband's friend came as none of us could drive and we needed to get back home.  We were sitting there, I was in total shock and unable to think, I was also throwing up because of the shock.  Suddenly a nurse came storming down the corridor shouting about moving the body, basically saying to get the body out of here.  We had no idea how to do this, my husband's friend asked what to do, the nurse just shoved a phone book at him and walked off.  Then we were asked to move from where we were waiting as patients would be coming in.  We looked around and found a corner curtained off, a bit private.  We sat there for a bit until a nurse told us that this area was for emergencies only, I guess my husband dying wasn't an emergency.  We had to wait in the main waiting room, Hannah and Christopher were crying, I was feeling sick and Mikey just sat and stared ahead.  David had gone with my husband's friend to tell my mother-in-law.  I felt that there was no compassion and no respect for our grief.  Hannah was just 10 years old and having nurses shout and tut at us didn't help her at all.

I always said that if somebody's dog died I wouldn't expect them to be treated like that.

And I was right.  3 years ago, our dog Lucky got very sick very quickly.  She was old, 12, which is the average life span for a labrador dog.  She had thrown up once, then the next day she couldn't stand up.  At first, I thought it was because of the heat and her age.  We took her to an emergency vets.  This was in 2020, the height of the pandemic, so only Christopher could go in with her.  But when the vet realized that she would have to be put to sleep because she had cancer and her lung had collapsed they broke protocol and let David and I come in.  We sat with her, talked to her, and kept her calm as she gently fell asleep.  We were told to take our time, that there was no rush to leave.  When we did leave, I went to the receptionist to pay, she offered her condolences.  The staff then carried Lucky out to the car and laid her very carefully in the back.  We got in the car to leave, as we turned to leave 3 of the staff members were outside bowing to us  Very different experience from when my husband died.  Our grief was respected and the staff showed compassion.

I know that there are good and bad hospitals and vets.  I know that the staff at the hospital might of been stressed.  But the least they could do is set aside a small room for families to sit in, have a list of funeral homes typed out and laminated.  Small things like that make a big difference when you are hit with a sudden death.

Again this is just my experience.  This has been playing on my mind recently, maybe just time of year, next week will be 11 years since my husband died.

Lucky

She was a yard dog.  When the weather was bad we would bring her inside but she hated it.  She would sit by the window and cry!!!

Everything Hurts

 The title of this post was going to be "Busy, Busy, Busy" and I am very busy with deep cleaning but doing just a bit has left me with aches and pains.  I feel so old!!  My problem is that my brain still thinks I'm in my 30's but my body feels like I'm over 80!!!!  

This morning I took the cushions off the sofa.  The plan was just to vacuum under the cushions, then pull the sofa out and clean the floor.  When I pulled off the big cushion I realized that it smelled bad.  Looks like the cats have been peeing in that corner.  I wanted to take off the covers off to wash but the zipper is jammed.  So I got a bucket of hot water, laundry soap, and a cloth and scrubbed the cushions, the back of the sofa, and down the sides.  I then sprayed it with something to stop the smell and discourage the cats,  doesn't really stop them but it helps a bit.  I've left the cushions in front of the window to dry, hope it helps.  Hannah helped a lot but just doing that bit has left me in pain, my knee, thighs, and lower back are killing me.  I'm actually shaking as I write this!!

So that means I MUST exercise.  I keep saying I'll start tomorrow or next week or in the New Year but if just doing half an hour cleaning leaves me so much pain then I have to start NOW.  (I'm telling myself this!!).   There are loads of chair exercise videos on YouTube and I have downloaded tons of books with exercises for seniors.

One reason this worries me more than usual is we will be moving soon and that means a lot of work.  Yes, I have 3 young men to help but I want to be able to pull my weight as well.  I'll let you know if I start and if it helps.

Hannah looking all grown up!!!

Just a photo of Hannah, makes a change from the cats!!!!

Cold

 Me not the weather.  The weather is very mild, up to 21C tomorrow, but Monday and Tuesday it's going to rain.

Yesterday morning I woke up coughing and sneezing. Just sneezing I know it's allergies but if I'm coughing as well, then it could be a cold or the start of flu.  There's a lot of that going round, almost everyday one student is absent because of a cold or the flu.  I'm trying to be careful but being around children almost everyday means that it's easy to catch something!!  But yesterday was very strange, I just could not get warm.  I ate a bit of breakfast so I could take some medicine, decided to sleep, hoping that by the time I had to teach I would feel a bit better.  Got into bed, had my electric blanket but I couldn't get warm, checked my temperature, it was only 35.5C,  I don't think I've ever had such a low temperature.  It stayed like that all day, even sitting in front of a heater didn't help.  By the evening I was feeling a bit better, drank a lot of hot tea and David had made a massive pot of chicken soup, which helped.  Still not sure what was wrong, just a very strange day!!   

I've been trying to clean as much as possible.  In Japan the week before New Years is the big cleaning time, I've tried to do it but it's so cold that it's difficult to get a lot done, so I've started early.  I've done the two rooms that we use for teaching, need to do the windows in there.  I want to get the kitchen done and the understairs cupboard this weekend.  We will see!!

Cat pictures as always.

Why?

Mama found the warm spot

Steve snuggled up

Hannah Is Back

 She came back yesterday.  I'm so happy she's back and even happier that she had a good experience.

Friday was the last day at the school, so the class had a little goodbye party for her.  She cried saying goodbye, this is the first time she has cried saying goodbye,  she graduated elementary school, junior high school and high school and never shed a tear.  One month with these kids she was crying!!  The homeroom teacher that she worked with cried as well.  They wrote messages for her, one kid suggested that she stay until they graduate, and another said that she liked Hannah's English accent and wants to sound like her.  They all expressed their gratitude for the lessons she gave and for spending time with them.

I'm so proud of her, she worked hard on her lesson plans, was courteous to the staff, spoke with confidence to the kids and this was reflected in the lovely messages she received.

I think she realized that running a home, even for one person takes planning and it's not always easy.  She was lucky in that the area she was staying in had shops nearby so she could just run out in the evening if she had forgotten something.  Towards the end she had figured out when to shop and that menu planning was important.  

Friday evening she and her friend who was at the same school went out to eat and to do karaoke.  She had fun.

All you can eat yaki niku

Hannah

Toast Came Back

 Early Monday morning Toast turned up!!

Saturday and Sunday I walked around the neighborhood, checking under cars, in trees and in people's yards but no sign of him.  Late Sunday evening I put more food out, I stood on the porch shaking the food but no Toast, just the stray cat!  So I decided to try the Japanese urban legend and told the stray cat about Toast, Christopher went out and said the same thing in Japanese.  Five hours later Toast came back!  I'm so happy about that!!

He's back!!

Unfortunately, my neck is bad again.  Another herniated disc.  Started Tuesday morning, I was hoping that it would correct itself and I wouldn't need the doctors.  But last night I couldn't sleep, lying down sent shooting pains down my left arm, so I sat on the sofa from 2 am.  Today went to the doctor, got an x-ray, which showed that there is no space between the vertebrae, and it's pinching on a nerve.  Had treatment with a TENS machine and a heating pad, that felt nice.  Got a month's worth of very strong painkillers. I really hope this rights itself soon as I have a lot to do.

Hannah is in her last week of teacher training.  I think she has learned a lot, not just the teaching part but also about living by herself.  She calls every day, which is nice for me.  This morning she called and said that she thinks she is overtired,  I asked why, if she was okay to go to school.  She said that she had put coffee in her cereal bowl.  

Toast

 No not the bread type but our little black cat!  He has run away.

Yesterday as I was letting in my student,  Alan, our other black cat, was trying to get out, so I got distracted.  Showing my student into the teaching room, putting the student's shoes away and pushing Alan out of the way, all at the same time.  I closed the front door and I thought locked the latch but I think it didn't catch properly.  A few minutes later Christopher said that the cats had gotten out.  He managed to get them back except for Toast.  Toast just took off!!  We put food out, looked around the garden, in the outside storage room and under the car but no cat.  I decided to wait until about 6pm, which is dusk here and a good chance that Toast is getting hungry and would be out looking for food.  Christopher and I walked around the neighborhood for a while but couldn't see him.  Came home and put more food out for Toast.  Problem is we have a stray cat that comes and goes, so he was hanging around and I think eating the food.  Christopher and I went out again at 9pm but still no Toast.  I went out again at 12:30 last night and early morning.  

I'm devastated that we have lost another cat.  I read about a Japanese urban legend that says you should ask stray cats to help find your lost cat.  So this morning I saw the stray cat and talked to him about Toast.  I don't know if that will help but I honestly don't know what else to do.

I had to tell Hannah, I didn't want to but she gets back next week and if Toast is not here she would be very upset and angry.  

Toast

I hope he comes back soon!!!

Feeling Nostalgic

 Maybe it's the time of year, maybe I'm just getting old but recently I've been thinking a lot about my childhood and teen years.

This started with a few Facebook groups I joined, talking about our memories, and things that a generation have in common.  Things like certain pop groups that we thought were the best ( The Osmonds), posters we would collect.  Listening to the Top 40 on a Sunday afternoon, waiting for a favorite song to come on.  Fashion that is cringe-worthy, American Tan tights with white socks over them,  platform shoes, I could never walk properly in them.  It's easy to look back and think how great everything was, how my generation had the best of times!  But did we?  

The news could be terrifying. I remember the kidnapping of Lesly Whittle.  She lived in the same village as my cousin's wife.  I was a bridesmaid at their wedding and remember driving past the Whittles house, the mother was outside sweeping the driveway, a scene I had seen on the news for many weeks!!

I'm on the end

Not a good photo, sorry.

I also remember a sugar shortage.  I couldn't understand why, and I don't think I've ever seen an explanation for that.

Another thing I remember was the IRA bombings.  I watched a documentary about this recently and found out that it was only a year but it felt longer.

One thing that I'm grateful for is the amount of information that is available either through the internet or documentaries that have been made. I can finally understand things that really baffled me as a kid. The news could seem strange,  why would a gate with water flowing over it be a big scandal in America.  I found out later that The Watergate was a hotel and office complex.  

Here's to memories and to making more.

I wonder what our kids will remember?