Bad Day

 Today has been one of the worst days for my allergies this season. This year, I haven't been too sick. This might be the third or fourth day that I can't function because of allergies so far this season. By now, I've usually been sick for over 10 days. Big improvement!

Last night I sat down and planned out my day. Get up at 7am. Christopher doesn't have work on Saturdays, so I don't need to make obento for him. Have breakfast, clean the kitchen a bit, go outside and pick weeds, cook lunch, then spend the afternoon reading and studying. 

But I woke up at 3am with my nose just dripping. I took some allergy medicine and tried to sleep again, but I started to sneeze, a full box of tissues later, and I was still sneezing. I realised that it was going to be one of those days!

I tried to sleep but could only doze between sneezing fits. I crawled out of bed at about 9am. Not too late, I decided that even if I couldn't do anything else, I could clean one area of the kitchen. I decided to clean where the kettle and cups are. It was a small enough job that I could do it in a few minutes, I also managed to clean off the dish drainer.

Lunch was last night's dinner. I had made a big pot of curry, so I just cooked some rice. 

I really wanted to sleep a bit, but it's hard with a constant runny nose! I watched TV a bit and tried to read, but I couldn't really concentrate.

I hope that this will pass! I want to get the house cleaned as much as possible before it gets too hot to move!

A photo of Sam in my window. Christopher was around the back of the house near my window. Sam had been relaxing on my lap. He heard Christopher, jumped on the windowsill and started hissing. His tail is all fluffed up!

Sam

Oh Dear

 I was looking for inspiration for today's post. I decided to look back at last May. I came across this post, Jackie's Japan Journal: Breaking Habits

Not good! One year and I'm still doing the same thing, still getting up too early, then going back to bed and sleeping most of the day away.

I have three questions that only I can answer. The first one is why do I sleep better in the day? I've always been a night owl; I've never been fond of early mornings or any mornings, actually. I know I'm able to get up and keep going all day. I did it when I travelled with Hannah earlier this year, also when I've had days out. So I don't think it's a physical problem, more an emotional one.

Another question is, do I want to be awake, to get things done or is escaping into sleep the only way I can cope with stress? My stress levels are high, but so are every ones elses! I'm not unique in this day and age. I worry constantly about my kids, and yes, I know they are adults, but the worry is still there. I worry about Hannah and her health, David's job and all the driving he has to do. Is Christopher alright in his job? Can he deal with all the walking once it gets hot (the nearest bus stop is a 40-minute walk from here; he's okay now, and it's good for him, but once the heat and humidity start, will he be alright? Heatstroke is a big problem in Japan)? Also, money always seems to be a big worry for me. We never seem to have enough, so I spend hours at night looking through YouTube trying to find a simple side hustle. The problem is that nothing is really simple.

The last question is, can I break this cycle? I've tried sleeping tablets to help me sleep at night, but they didn't really work. I need to find a good rhythm for my life. I know my health isn't that good, but sleeping constantly isn't helping. Looking back over my planning book for the past couple of weeks, sleep is always marked as bad! All the other areas are either ok or good. 

As much as I don't want to, I think I'll have to make a schedule, what time to get up, what time to rest, what time to go to bed. I feel like I'm going backwards with my life! Five days a week, I get up at 5am to make breakfast and obento. I know I don't have to, that Christopher can make his own obento, and anyone else who wants breakfast can help themselves. But I feel it's the least I can do! I then stay awake until 7am to call Hannah. She has to take her epilepsy medicine between 7 and 7:30. Most days, she can get up by herself, but sometimes she doesn't have confidence that she'll hear her alarm. I send her cat photos, so her phone is pinging a lot. After that, I doze with the idea to get up at 9am to start my day, but some days I don't wake up until 10 or 11 am! That's bad, my whole morning has gone! I definitely need a schedule!!

Another thing that has me worried is that it's been a year since we started advertising our English school here, and there have been no calls at all. I don't know what to do.

I was hoping that we could get some students so David could teach; it's better than the job he has now, which is making him ill. He's lost so much weight he looks gaunt!

David, he doesn't look good!

But still fools around, he was driving when Hannah took this selfie!

I asked why he doesn't get a full-time job at a company. He said that it's hell working full-time, the income is about the same, and you are expected to work overtime and go drinking after work. The Japanese have a word for death caused by overwork, karoshi, which shows how often that happens. People are literally worked to death.

I'm going to suggest he tries to get students online, even a few would help. I need to teach more as well. I'm wondering if the time of just advertising and getting lots of students has passed.

Sorry, I'm just rambling here!

Goodbye Hannah

 Hannah had to go back to her apartment today, because she has classes from tomorrow morning.

It was nice having her here for a few days, but it's always kind of sad when she goes back. I know her life is there now; she has classes and starts two weeks of teacher training soon. But the house feels quiet and empty, even though the other kids are here. Is there another word for adult children? It always feels weird to say kids when they are adults, but my kids!

The weather was really nice today, so I decided to go along with Mikey. Part of the journey is along the river.

I like this part of the river; it always looks clean.  It's the last day of the Golden Week holiday, so a lot of people were out. There are a few golf courses, or maybe just practice areas, along the river.

We did a bit of shopping. Hannah needed a few things from Daiso, the 100-yen shop, and some bits and pieces from the supermarket. I thought about going to a few other places, but we were both tired.

Of course, we got lost! But I actually enjoyed that, got to see some other parts of the city!

Lovely temple gate

Even in the middle of the city, there are so many green spaces.

As we came back to Kurume, we saw the tail end of the shinkansen.

You can just see the Shinkansen as it pulls into the station.

The building on the left, with the cranes, has gone up very quickly. It was started just over a year ago! Mikey and I were wondering what the appeal of living at the top of these kinds of buildings was. Not for me, I don't like heights, and I would worry about earthquakes.

I need to rest, I have a few busy days ahead, I really want to make the most of this good weather before it gets too hot and humid!

A New Recipe

 I have so many cookbooks, most of the time I just read through them, but I never get around to making anything! Kind of defeats the purpose of having the books, doesn't it?

Yesterday I was looking through a Japanese cookbook when I came across a recipe using bean sprouts, moyashi in Japanese. These are always cheap and rather filling, but I never know what to do with them. I asked Hannah to help me translate the recipe. I found that besides the bean sprouts, I had everything to hand to make it, so that was tonight's dinner.

Bean Sprouts and Cabbage in a Savoury Sauce with Fluffy Eggs

Ingredients

Bean Sprouts 2 bags

Cabbage, about the same amount as the bean sprouts, cut into strips

Mushrooms, just a few of any kind

For the sauce

Chinese Soup stock powder 4tsp

Sugar 3tbs (I used less, about 2 tbs as I thought it would be too sweet, good call as the taste was just right)

Ponzu 3tbsp (Mentsuyu can be used instead or citrus soy, 1tbsp of soy sauce and 1 tbsp of lemon juice)

Water 200 ml

Potatoe startch 1tbsp

For the Eggs

Eggs 4 large

Milk 1tbsp

Ingredients

I didn't use all the cabbage, it's massive!

Chop the cabbage and mushrooms, rinse the bean sprouts. Stir fry in a large frying pan. I used a wok.

Frying the vegetables

While the vegetables are cooking, prepare the sauce. Mix the sauce ingredients together in a small bowl.

Once the vegetables are cooked, add the sauce. Stir the sauce well before adding, as the starch tends to collect at the bottom of the bowl.

Mix the sauce and vegetables thoroughly and cook until the sauce is thickened. 

With the sauce

Transfer the vegetables onto a serving plate, add oil to the pan and scramble the eggs until they are firm but not dry.

Fluffy eggs

Pour the eggs over the vegetables, and serve with rice.

The finished dish.

This was very quick to make and easy.

I always taste things as I go along. This didn't need anything added, but if you like a saltier taste, then a bit more ponzu would work.

I also next time I'll use more eggs!

If you make this, let me know!

Hannah bought me another cookbook, in Japanese, using the microwave to cook the dishes. I think in the summer that will be a lot better than standing over a hot stove. Once I've tried a few recipes, I'll post them on here!

Greenery Day

 Today is the second of four national holidays that make up Golden Week. Today is Greenery Day, a day to appreciate nature.

The origins of Greenery Day are closely tied to Emperor Showa (Hirohito), who had a lifelong passion for plants and biology.

Before his passing in 1989, April 29th was celebrated as the Emperor's Birthday. That day was renamed Greenery Day until 2007, when April 29th became Showa Day, and May 4th was renamed Greenery Day. This shift helped distinguish between honouring the Showa era and celebrating nature itself.

This time of year is lovely in Japan, usually! The weather is mild, the humidity is low, a great chance to get out of the cities and enjoy nature. People tend to hike or have picnics. There are also a lot of botanical gardens to explore throughout Japan.

I just like the idea of not having to work for a few days! I used to teach during Golden Week, but most of my students would have plans, so it's easier just to have a break before the intense heat of the summer starts, which keaves me drained!

I have enough greenery around here, I don't have to go anywhere to appreciate it!

I had a little walk around the garden, it feels so fresh after that awful storm yesterday.

Just a little video of the garden. I really have to get out and trim the trees and try and pull more weeds. It really is never ending!

Not very clear but there are plums growing on the tree.

I have no idea what these are but they are pretty.

The side of the house

This side I need to clear out as much as possible as both the electric meter and water meter are down there, somewhere! I feel sorry for the workers who have to fight through that jungle just to read the meters. 

Does anyone enjoy gardening? I like the idea of gardening, once everything is set up but having to cleaar out this garden is putting me off the idea!

A Slow Cosy Day

 That sounds a lot more positive than I'm totally wiped out from yesterday and haven't done anything at all today! I did make breakfast and obento, and have spent time reading!

I think I overdid it yesterday. I cleaned, made a big lunch, then spent an hour at Costco.  Most days, I would do just one of those things, but I'm trying to do more, be more proactive. That kind of backfired!

Also, today's weather isn't helping. It's been raining all day. This morning it was like a typhoon, strong winds and rain.

I was only outside for a minute, but got soaked through. I went to check whether the stuff hanging around outside had blown away. Mikey's rain gear had blown onto the garden, and a blue sheet had blown across the front of the house. Not a big problem. I was worried about David's car being hit by flying debris.

The wind has died down, but it's still raining. This is from my window. I'm a bit worried about how the water is collecting in the gully outside the house.

Today is the first day of Golden Week, which features four consecutive national holidays. For a lot of people, it's a chance to get away, but with the weather being so bad, I guess a lot of plans have been cancelled. Today's holiday is Constitutional Memorial Day. 

I should go and make some dinner, at least do something today!

Hannah's Birthday, Costco And Good Friends

 Today is Hannah's birthday, 24! Where have those years gone?

When I see Hannah today, a beautiful, confident, young lady, it's hard to believe that she started life as a premmie!

She was so small, just 900 grams, that the doctor gave her just 30% chance of surviving past a couple of weeks. She was born so early, just 26 weeks, that her lungs hadn't developed at all! There was a possibility that she could have serious brain damage, with a very low quality of life.

But she not only survived, she thrived!

I've been looking back at photos of Hannah over the years!

With Hisao, just a few months old.

With Granddad, about a year old.

Her 6th birthday.

Having a laugh!

We were trying to take a photo for our New Year's card. But everyone was fooling around, it took about 3 hours just to get one photo! 

Graduating from elementary school.

Starting high school.

Graduating from university.

A couple of months ago at Mojiko.

She has dealt with the setback of being diagnosed with epilepsy very well. It took her a few months to get used to the tablets that she has to take; they make her sleepy, but now that she is used to them, they don't bother her so much. She is very determined to graduate with her Master's Degree in Education and work as an English teacher in junior high school.

She came home this morning, we had a nice lunch together. It was nice having everyone around the table, just talking and laughing!

After lunch, we went to Costco. I know I keep saying that I don't have money, but we went to Costco before Christmas, paying almost 5,000 yen for membership. I think it's a waste just to go once a year. The Costco we went to is about 30 minutes drive from here. I've been saving my 500 yen coins since Christmas to go again. I spent more than I saved, but Christopher paid on his credit card, I'll have to pay him back bit by bit.

The weather was really nice, warm, sunny and not really humid.

Just a short video on the way to Costco. I love the Japanese countryside (except for the insects); it always feels so open and clean.

Costco was packed. It's a Saturday and the beginning of the Golden Week holiday. We spent an hour shopping. I wanted to buy so much, but I stuck to the basics that I buy from Costco, the most important being cheese, really cheese. I managed to get some baked beans! A pack of six cost 1600 yen. I got two packs. A couple of months ago, I bought a tin for 500 yen at an import shop. I was tempted to buy some lamb, but a small piece was over 6,000 yen, maybe for Christmas!

The cabbage I got is massive and only 129 yen; last year, cabbages were about 700 yen.

And, finally, a shout-out to my friend who sent me some rice! She doesn't know how much that means to me! Thank you so much!!!

I Caught A Cold

 Or my allergies are very bad!

Not sure which one, but I feel awful! 

I woke up this morning feeling like I hadn't slept. I had a headache, sore throat, runny nose and no energy whatsoever. I know that a couple of kids I was teaching on Tuesday said that they had colds, so maybe I picked up something from them.

This is typical of me. I have a week's holiday, tomorrow is Hannah's birthday. I have plans and ideas for things I want to do. Getting sick was not part of the plan. I'm sipping ginger tea and trying not to feel sorry for myself.

I always feel May is the last good month. The last month before the heat and humidity set in and make just everyday chores feel impossible.

Having only one working air conditioner doesn't help. I should get at least one more for the kitchen/dining area, but of course, no money.

I was thinking about our money situation yesterday and wondering why it's so hard. I realised that David's and Christopher's combined income is enough to support one person, but it has to support three people. That's crazy.

This is the reality of Japan. I know people in other countries are also struggling, but I only know that from the news.

I'm really wondering what to do. We haven't got any new students; I actually lost one, which really doesn't help. I guess looking into online teaching! Also, I keep seeing these videos about making things like print-on-demand or digital products. They make it look so easy: go to Canva, click here, drag this and voila, you have a product to sell. I keep trying, but end up getting so frustrated that I want to throw my laptop through the window!

I'm just rambling, sorry!

Hisao in May.

This collage just came up on my Google Photos.

April

 It feels as if this month has flown past.

I didn't get as much done as I had hoped this month, but I've made a good start on a few long-term projects.

One is the storage room. I know it isn't really important to clean it out, but it feels like this little annoyance at the back of my mind. I went up yesterday, just for a few minutes, didn't do much, but managed to sort out two more boxes. I realised that when we were packing up the last house, a lot of stuff that should have been thrown out was packed up, so now I'm throwing stuff out!

Another thing I've been working on is the garden. Whenever the weather has been nice, I've gone out and pulled weeds. Not a lot, but it's starting to make a difference. I have a few plants that I want to plant out soon; they are on my windowsill at the moment.

Pumpkin, watermelon and green pepper plants.

I'm still hoping to get some new students. But so far nothing! I guess just keep on posting leaflets and updating our homepage. I really don't know what else to do!

I'm hoping May will be productive. We have a few days' holiday from Saturday, Golden Week. Hannah is coming home for a while; it's her birthday soon.

I'm thinking of setting a few goals for May. I always feel that May is the last month that I can do something before the heat and humidity start. 

Does anyone else have goals for May?

Memories

 Recently, I've been sorting out the thousands of photos and videos I have stored on Google. I pay for the cheapest storage, but I worry about using up too much space.

While I was doing that the other day, I came across some videos of the cats from a few years ago. I actually don't remember taking these videos; maybe Hannah took them.

These were all happy, funny memories.

As I scrolled down, I noticed that the photos went back to 2002, when Hannah was born!

I then came across photos from the last time we went to England before Mom died.

These were hard photos to look at!

Mom with Hannah

Watching the boys play

With me, Hannah and Mikey

Mom was 63, the same age as I am now!

It's hard to believe that a year after these photos were taken, she had lost her battle with cancer.

I often wonder did she feel old. I don't, I know I'm 63, my body feels older sometimes, but in my mind, in my feelings, I feel like I'm in my 30s.

Mom is giving Hannah her bottle.

With Mom's friend

Looks like they are having a good talk

Mom really loved babies and children. I always felt sorry that she didn't get that much time with my kids. One thing that has always hurt me was the fact that my mother-in-law could see my kids as much as she wanted to, but she was never interested in them, until they were old enough to help her with her field work. My Mom would have just dotted on them!

The view from Sedgley Beacon

Sedgley Beacon

One day during our trip, we had a walk over the beacon. It used to be a lovely area to walk, just to ramble around. I remember spending summer holidays here, just walking and talking with friends. I was surprised to find that part of it was closed off. 

I always loved that view. I used to imagine having one of the "posh houses" near my parents' house. I guess life had other ideas!

 I'm glad that we made the effort to go. I still remember saying goodbye. That was so hard. I knew it was the last time to see Mom. I tried not to cry in front of her; it was hard for her as well. But once I got in the taxi, I just bawled. I cried all the way to the airport, 3 hours on the coach! 

These photos are happy/sad photos. I'm happy that Mom got the chance to meet her grandkids, especially Hannah. But sad that this was the only time. I think Mom would be very proud of how my kids have turned out!

I Made Bread

 I love baking!

Some of my earliest memories are of helping Mom make apple pie and a Victoria sponge on Sunday mornings. While the oven was on for the roast, Mom would bake to use up the space in the oven. I remember her saying that it was a waste to heat the oven just for the meat!

When I was in my teens, it became my job to make the apple pie; apparently, my pastry turned out better than my Mom's!

When I had my own kids, I used to bake at least once a week. I found that the snacks and sweets here in Japan were too sweet. Also, the more I read about the obesity problems in the West, the more concerned I became about our health. By making cookies, cakes and occasionally bread, I could control what ingredients went in. One ingredient that is used in commercial snacks is high fructose corn syrup. It's one of the ingredients that the body can't use; it's converted into fat by the liver. Excess amounts of it lead to obesity, fatty liver and diabetes. 

Baking was my go-to thing to do when I got stressed. Measuring, mixing, pouring, waiting and of course eating the end product would relax me. One time, Hisao came home, and I had spent the afternoon baking 4 different kinds of cookies. The first question he asked me was, "Who upset you?" 

I used to bake for my students, for Halloween and Christmas. I stopped a few years ago as it was getting too much for me. But for the few years I did, I enjoyed the challenge.

Recently, however, I haven't taken time to bake. Sometimes I might make a cake or a few cookies, but I haven't really tried anything new. The other day, I came across a YouTube channel of a Japanese lady baking bread and cakes. I watched a few of her videos; she had English subtitles, which helps, and because she's in Japan, the ingredients she uses are easily available.

I decided to try her Garlic Cheese Bread. A simple, no-knead bread!

This is how it started.

Water, yeast, sugar, oil, skim milk powder.

Add the bread flour

Add the flour and mix to make a dough.

Let the dough rest, then stretch it out, let it rest again.

After stretching the dough a second time, it has to prove. This is where I realised that I hadn't watched the video carefully. The proving time was 2 hours. I somehow missed that bit of information when I first watched the video.

It wasn't a big problem. I had taken my computer to the dining area, so while I was waiting for the bread to prove, I messed around on my computer. I also washed dishes and cleaned part of the fridge!

After the dough had doubled, it had to be rolled out.

It worked; the dough doubled in size.

Once it was rolled out, I put a mix of butter, garlic and parsley on it and sprinkled it with shredded cheese, a lot of cheese! Then cut it into strips; each strip is then rolled up and put in a muffin tin.

Before baking.

The dough has to prove again and then be baked.

The finished bread.

They were really nice. The only problem is that the recipe makes just six buns. I'll have to double the recipe next time.

I think I should try some other easy breads. I know that they aren't that good for my diet, but I get so much joy out of making them.  I was actually dancing around the kitchen when I saw the dough had doubled in size. I was so happy that it worked!

May I Ask A Favor?

 I cringe when I hear those words on a YouTube channel; it's usually asking people to subscribe.

But I'm asking here, not to subscribe but to go to my Ko-fi page and leave a small donation!

Cheeky, I know, but we are really struggling at the moment.

David is trying to set up an English school here; he's been posting leaflets and has set up a web page, but no calls at all! 

I know the middle of the countryside isn't the best place to start an English school, but this is where we are. There's a junior high school about 20 minutes' walk from here, so I was hoping to get some students from there, but nothing no calls at all.

I've been trying to get online students, not really my thing, but I'm willing to try. 

I'm trying to keep positive, but it's getting harder and harder.

We are living month to month, there is nothing left over to save. I've been trying to save to do some work on this house. At the moment, it's more cosmetic work that needs to be done, but I noticed this morning an awful smell coming from under the bathroom sink. I opened the cupboard and noticed that the area is very wet, looks like there's a leak somewhere. The water has started to rot the bottom of the cupboard, and maybe the floor underneath! That is more than just changing the sink; I might need to redo the floor as well.

I've watched hours and hours of videos on how to make money, but it all seems so hard! I thought about making colouring books to sell on KDP, but I would have to use AI to generate the pictures and that can run into problems with copyrights and other legal issues that I just don't get. I thought I could get around that by using my own photos of the cats to make pictures to colour. But I would still have problems, maybe.

This is one of the pictures that I made using AI. Cute!

I need to figure out a few other income streams. I think a lot of people are in the same boat. 

Any ideas?

Of Course.....

 I got sick!

Not really sick, just very bad seasonal allergies. Actually, this season it's the first time I've felt really sick because of allergies. I've been eating yoghurt almost every day for the past few months, maybe half a year now, and I've noticed that my allergies aren't that bad. Most years, by this time, I would have been sick for about 10 days, with really heavy sneezing, maybe 3 or 4 hours non-stop sneezing, sinus headaches, sore throat and low-grade fever. This season, however, I've only had two days like that. I'm still taking medicine, but a lot less than usual.

Of course, I got sick just as I started to use my planning book! But I didn't give up on it. I realised that this is my problem. I start something, a new diet, exercise routine, study program, whatever I'm working on, then life happens, and I give up.

Not this time. One of the ideas behind my planning book is to see what I need to do to make my life better. Giving up because things aren't working out how they should defeats the purpose of the book. 

Life is messy. It's full of starts and stops, of nights lying awake, wondering how to pay the bills, of days feeling like you've been hit by a bus. Days when just the thought of exercise makes you cringe, or seeing another salad makes you run for the hills.  At least my life feels like this sometimes, most of the time, maybe!

This is real life. Not some YouTube or Instagram snapshot. It's my life, running on empty most of the time. But I need to find a way to be accountable and consistent in my choices.

Like eating yoghurt every day, I read that eating fermented food can help with gut health, which helps with allergies. I don't really understand the science behind but I figured, why not give it a go? I like yoghurt, plain with no sugar. I add a banana or some other fruit and have it for breakfast. I was consistent with that, and now I can see that my allergies aren't as crippling as in the past. So, being consistent in one small habit is reaping the rewards a few months down the line.

This is the reason behind the planning book: being consistent in areas of my life that, at this moment in time, are important.

A few people have left comments or reached out to me personally. First of all, a big thank you, it's nice to get comments!

Secondly, I realised, after my last post, that it seemed like I was trying to tackle a lot at once. I'm not, I've done that so many times, and it has never lasted more than a few days.

My focus now is on my health, especially eating and moving. I'm not going to diet as in follow a set program. I've done that so many times in the past and never lost any weight or felt better in myself. I'm trying to be mindful of what I eat, making sure I get enough protein every day and plenty of vegetables. But if I have a bad day, I'm not going to beat myself up about it! The same with exercise, today I went shopping, so I'm counting that as part of my exercise for today! I'm not looking for perfection, just consistency!

The other things I wrote, sleep, study and cleaning, I'm not actively trying to do more, just being aware that these are areas of my life that I do need to address!

I've only had the planning book set up for 3 days, so I'll write more on how it's helping once I've used it for a few more days!

The other day, I was shopping when I noticed these bikes parked outside the store.

Bikes outside a store.

The bags in the basket are from the clothes shop, just over the road. This is so Japanese. In the UK, the bikes would have been taken. Here you can leave your shopping in the basket while you shop!

Crime does happen! But not as epidemic as in other countries. It was nice to see this somehow. 

My Planning Book

 Today I managed to go out and pull some weeds in between rain showers.

This is how much I could pull out.

A lot of weeds.

But when I looked at where I was working, it didn't look any different.

Did I make a difference?

I felt this is what my life is like at the moment. 

I'm trying to reset my life, make changes that I need to make, but it all feels futile. I keep working on routines, on doing the things that I need to do to make my life better, but I don't see any progress.

I still haven't lost weight, haven't gained any, which is good, I guess. My eating is all over the place; some days are very good, other days are very bad. 

I ache and feel like I have no strength in my legs. 

I sleep too much during the day and watch TV until late at night.

I haven't picked up a study book in weeks. 

The house and garden are still a mess.

Before I went on my little trip, I bought a planning notebook. Just a simple 100yen book. It's been sitting on my desk, staring at me since then.

Today, after the weeding that had me so frustrated, I decided that I had to set up this book. Start tracking what I'm doing, what I need to do to improve my life.

This is how I've set it up for now.

Just a place to note what I'm doing.

Sleep is the first thing on the list. I struggle so much with staying awake during the day. Sometimes I am really tired or sleepy. At the moment, I'm taking a load of allergy meds, which make me so sleepy. When I'm like that, a little nap helps; otherwise, I get awful headaches. But I know that crawling into bed during the day is just an escape. I don't want to deal with the stress that I have, especially our money situation. It's bad, I know, but I haven't been able to break this awful cycle. I've proved to myself that I can get up and keep going all day, but most days I don't want to. My plan for this week is to get up at 5am (except Tuesday, I don't have to make obento on Tuesdays), make breakfast and obento, then sleep again until about 9 o'clock. On Tuesday, I want to get up at 7am and start my day!

The next two things are water and eating. I'm good at drinking enough water, most days. My eating needs a lot of work. Last year, I managed to stop eating carbs at breakfast and dinner, just a small portion at lunch. I lost a bit of weight doing that. At the moment, I don't eat carbs at breakfast, but dinner is a lot harder. Some days I have a sandwich for dinner, if I could get good bread, it might be alright, but the bread here is very light and not filling at all! Also, I need to stay away from sweets; I've been backsliding on that lately.

Next is cleaning. I've let that slide. I do the dishes; it feels constant, but I know it isn't. Other than that, I haven't kept up with housework. Everywhere is a mess. I always feel that this house is tatty and uncared for; the tiles in the bathroom are broken, there are holes in the walls and doors (not just the cats, but from when we lived here before). I don't like this house; cleaning feels like a waste of time. I have to change this attitude, try to make it nice, somehow! 

 Exercise, I need to do some every day. Either walking, stretching or something. I really don't enjoy exercising; maybe walking is alright, but other than that, it really is a burden. I know that if I don't start and keep it up, then in a few years, I won't have the strength or energy to do anything. I want to have energy as I get older. I don't want to end up being unable to do anything for myself, so I have to start now!

I added going outside to my list. I was going to put gardening, but some days I don't have the energy to do anything but I like to just walk around the garden, see what flowers are blooming, check on the blueberries. I spend so much time in my room, so just getting outside is good for me.

The last thing on my list is to study. Japanese, of course, but also history. I've found that I'm really fascinated by history. I want to try to learn more about Japanese history, especially this area. Also, I realised that I don't know much about English history.

At the bottom of the page, I've left a space to write down the positive things from the day. I need to have a much more positive outlook on life. 

I don't know if I'll keep this planning book like this or change it as I go along. We will see.

If anyone else is doing anything similar, drop me a comment.

Shopping

 Shopping is a love/hate experience for me!

I love to find bargains, but hate it when everything I usually buy keeps going up.

I remember when we used to visit home, in the 1990s, my Mom would do a big weekly shop at Tesco. The store she went to was a massive place which sold all the groceries Mom wanted, plus clothes, household items, toys and books. All the shopping was done in one place, and the prices always seemed reasonable. I'm guessing that's not the reality in the UK now!

Here I go to about 7 different supermarkets and two different drug stores in the hope of getting what I need. David usually stops by a discount supermarket on the way back from work. He gets a lot of daily things like bread, milk, cheese, eggs, and cleaning supplies. That helps a lot!

I buy most of the vegetables, meat, fish and yoghurts. Between us, we spend over 10,000 yen a week, about £50. Sometimes less, most of the time more. Plus, Christopher picks up things from his supermarket if there's a sale on stuff that we use.

Today, Mikey took me to two supermarkets. One has a good selection of fruits and vegetables, plus the fish was reasonable today; the other usually has good meat.

Today, however, everything was very expensive! I know that a lot of items went up this month, but I wasn't expecting to see such a large increase in basic foodstuffs!

These packs of beans used to be 70 yen, now they are 88 yen.

They are small packs, but great for putting on salads or throwing into soups. But a price increase of 18 yen was rather shocking.

The same with breast chicken. For many years, the price was 39 yen for 100 grams, making it a good choice for a tight budget. Today, in a discount supermarket, breast chicken was 129 yen for 100 grams. I know that there's been a problem with chickens and eggs worldwide because of the bird flu, but that's a crazy increase.

If it's just one or two items that have gone up, it's not a problem, but it looks like everything is a lot more expensive. According to the news, about 2,000 items have gone up.

I wanted to try something new, so I bought these today.  

Quail eggs.

I plan to wrap them in pork mince and bread crumbs and fry them. Mini scotch eggs! These are for Christopher's obento; he likes these quail eggs, I don't know if anyone else does!

We really have to grow some vegetables. David has bought a few little plants to start. At the moment, they are in my room. I hope they grow!

pumpkin plants

Watermelon and green pepper.

We wanted to get some strawberry plants, but they didn't look healthy at all!

I'm really trying to save money and be frugal, but it feels like a losing battle.  I cook mainly Japanese-style meals, as buying imported food is very expensive.

Any ideas for budget meals?

I have a few that I'm trying out, I'll let you know how that goes in another post!

Ten Years Ago

 This week, 10 years ago, the Kumamoto Earthquake happened.

I can't believe it's 10 years, feels like just a couple of years ago.

I wrote about it here: Jackie's Japan Journal: EARTHQUAKE

I remember thinking that this was the closest I had been to a large earthquake,the epicentre was about 2 hours drive from where we lived and I don't want to get any closer.

I've been through typhoons and thunderstorms that were scary, but an earthquake is on a whole different level of fear, at least for me.

With weather disasters, you can track the storm's location and prepare. With an earthquake, it just happens, no warning, sometimes the phone alert will go off, but that is only a few seconds before the quake hits. The closest weather disaster like that is a tornado. 

One thing I want to know is how the Japanese people keep so calm when these disasters happen.

I remember watching the news, the station was reporting on one area that was badly hit, showing some of the damage to the roads and buildings. This was a live report. During the report, there was an aftershock; the camera panned to the entrance of the shopping mall. People were walking out very calmly, parents were reassuring their kids, and staff were helping older customers who weren't steady on their feet. No screaming, no hysterics, just moving to safety.  

Another scene I remember was of a line of people that had to evacuate, this was the morning after the big quake, M7 at the epicentre. They were waiting to get a riceball and some tea. Again, everyone was very calm, the old ladies stood talking like this was an everyday occurrence. There was no pushing, no demanding special treatment.

My reaction was an overreaction. I felt so vulnerable. Maybe because it was just a few years after Hisao died, maybe it was because I had never experienced anything that terrifying before, maybe it was because I felt that the safety of my kids depended on me. Maybe a bit of everything. One of the first things I did was to check the price of tickets back to the UK! I knew I couldn't go back, but I wanted an option! 

Since then, we've had a few jolts, nothing that bad though. The past couple of months, there has been a swarm of small earthquakes south of where Hannah lives. Hannah calls me to see if we felt the earthquake, but usually we don't!  

One thing in Japan is that there is a lot of awareness of earthquakes. From a young age, children are taught what to do in case of an earthquake; it is drilled into them. One thing they are told is to follow instructions and not panic. I think I need this training!

I hope I never go through another earthquake like that!

I talk to the mountain that we are at the base of, I ask it not to fall on us! I worry a lot about landslides caused by rainstorms or earthquakes.

The mountain.

I know it looks faraway but a road that runs parrell to here was inundated by a landslide a few years ago. If I hadn't seen that maybe I wouldn't worry so much!

The Garden.....Again

 It has been raining continuously for the past few days. Not heavy downpours, just constant, non-stop rain.

This area has needed this rain; actually, more rain would help. The winter was very dry, with very little rain and almost no snow, even in the mountains. Some of the dams that serve the area are very low, about 30% of capacity! I don't know if a few days of rain helped, but at least the fields and gardens got watered.

This was on Tuesday, going to teach. The clouds were so low that you couldn't see the mountains!

Today, however, the sun is shining, the temperature is just right at 22℃, and the garden is coming alive again.

It's still a mess. We need to get out and really pull the weeds and start to plant a few things. But even with the weeds, the bushes and trees look beautiful.

These flowers are so beautiful; the tree is full of them. They are Japanese snowball flowers, I think.

I'm not good with flower, tree or shrub names, I just know what I like!

This is just outside my window.

The last of the cherry blossoms!

Another beautiful azalea.

I took a little video. The first bush in the videos is the blueberry bush; it's really blooming. I hope that we can get some fruit this summer. When it's really hot, I love to mix yoghurt and blueberries, then put them in the freezer as a nice cool snack.

I sat outside for a bit, just enjoying the sun and the warm breeze, listening to the birds in the distance. I was joined by this little guy.

A new friend?

I don't like insects, but I'm trying to appreciate their place in the ecosystem. I told him to stay outside, where he'll be safe! 

David bought a couple of pumpkin plants, which are sitting on my windowsill. I hope we can plant them out soon.

We are going to the home centre tomorrow, so I might pick up a couple more little plants to try.