Guilt

 Because of the heat I have to get up early, between 5 and 6am, to do housework.  Yesterday I managed to do all the floors, this morning I cleaned the kitchen.  Each day I try to get as much done before 9am.  That means that most days unless I have classes I can spend time reading, studying Japanese or watching TV.  Sounds great but I always feel guilty because I'm not doing anything productive.  My garden is a disaster but there is no way I can go out when the tempreture is 38C.  The bedrooms need cleaning, the bathroom as well but it's seems impossible to do anything.  And after this week it looks like even going shopping is out of the question.  Maybe one store but not like on Monday going to 3 different places and getting so sick.   

I don't like summer.  I don't like that I can't do everything I need to do.  I get so frustrated with myself and end up taking it out on the kids.  I would love to have a lovely cool summer, be able to go out and enjoy myself but it's not to be.  This Sunday is the summer festival here, I would love to go but I know that just walking to the area would end up with me getting heatstroke it heat exhaustion.  Mikey is doing cotton candy.  One good thing is that he will be working with somebody else so they can take turns to sell and then rest in the air conditioning!!

The cats are miserable as well.  They are just lying around, but at night when it is a bit cooler they start to fight!  

Hot cat