Since hubby died I haven't had the energy to more than what I have to do. Get the kids meals, clean up (a bit), teach a few lessons. Not a lot but just that has been exhausting for me. Grieving takes a lot of energy plus the stress of being a single parent. My kids are great and are handling this a lot better than me. But they are kids (well maybe not Mikey but even he is only 21) and they are under stress from school as well as all the stuff going on here. So we have a few more fights, few more melt downs than before. Hubby was the one to discipline the kids and I really miss that. I don't want to shout at the kids but the bickering is driving me crazy. Kind of emotional over drive!
On Sunday I decided to do a little party for the kids. Nothing to celebrate but I wanted to do something special for them. Eat some nice food and watch a movie together. Hannah had a book form the school library and wanted to make a yogurt cake. So we made that and I did some cookies. I think we had a nice evening. Felt strange without hubby, whenever we watched a movie without subtitles he would always ask questions. Use to drive me crazy, but I really missed that on Sunday.
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| Party food |
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| Yogurt cake |
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| Mikey looking cool with Christopher's glasses |
Firstly, I wanted to say I'm sorry for not commenting on your blog earlier. Second, I wanted to add something comforting ...something that would help you but I'm not so good at that sometimes. I do understand grief. I found that I just needed to be kind to myself. I needed to just let go of guilt when I didn't perform (for lack of a better word) like I used to. I know I was not much help here but I wanted you to know that I care.
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